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Ohio report


Parsnip Totin Jack

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So7 went to Ohio last week for a wedding and to visit friends there. He had a great time. Per Wo7’s instructions he took some boxes of papers from RtJ’s house to LAJ in the assisted living place. Wo7 asked RtJ to do it but he never got around to it; it’s less than five miles so it’s not the distance. So7 also did some grocery shopping for LAJ, mostly junk food he can’t get where he’s at. So7 blasted RtJ for not visiting. He’s your Dad!  Since we were there last December/January he has had no visitors. 

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1 hour ago, Old No. 7 said:

So7 went to Ohio last week for a wedding and to visit friends there. He had a great time. Per Wo7’s instructions he took some boxes of papers from RtJ’s house to LAJ in the assisted living place. Wo7 asked RtJ to do it but he never got around to it; it’s less than five miles so it’s not the distance. So7 also did some grocery shopping for LAJ, mostly junk food he can’t get where he’s at. So7 blasted RtJ for not visiting. He’s your Dad!  Since we were there last December/January he has had no visitors. 

That would never happen in the Paris, where people are generally more decent than in the rest of the country.

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5 minutes ago, roadsue said:

I don’t know who RtJ and LAJ are. I’m missing the point. 

Long story going back many years. There on miles of threads on the whole in-law family in Ohio. W07 and I have been married over 30 years. Lazy-ass Joe (LAJ) is Wo7's oldest brother. I don't know if he is the way he is because of nature vs nurture. But growing up as first born he didn't have to do anything to get what he wants. When I first met him was around the holidays one year, 1989 I think. He is adding sugar to his bowl of frosted flakes. I said something and he replied that HE likes it this way. Ok fine. I tell my wife later and she says that when he turned 18 he announced to the family, on his birthday, that since he was now an adult he wasn't eating vegetables anymore. And hasn't. Told my wife this is guy headed to diabetestown. He married a woman I call Pack-rat Terry (PRT). Because she is a classic hoarder. W07's sister is Janet the Martyr (JtM) because she was the one taking care of Mother when no one else would; even when we offered. JtM's husband is Silent Doug (SD) a nice guy but he never says anything because Jtm does all the talking. LAJ and PRT has a son, Robert-the-Jedi (RtJ) because his parents were heavily into Star Trek/Wars/ sci fi stuff, so RtJ is too.  I'll add more family history later if you want it. LAJ is 63, chronic kidney disease. Goes to dialysis three days a week and lives in Assisted Living because no one can stand living with him.

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4 minutes ago, Old No. 7 said:

Long story going back many years. There on miles of threads on the whole in-law family in Ohio. W07 and I have been married over 30 years. Lazy-ass Joe (LAJ) is Wo7's oldest brother. I don't know if he is the way he is because of nature vs nurture. But growing up as first born he didn't have to do anything to get what he wants. When I first met him was around the holidays one year, 1989 I think. He is adding sugar to his bowl of frosted flakes. I said something and he replied that HE likes it this way. Ok fine. I tell my wife later and she says that when he turned 18 he announced to the family, on his birthday, that since he was now an adult he wasn't eating vegetables anymore. And hasn't. Told my wife this is guy headed to diabetestown. He married a woman I call Pack-rat Terry (PRT). Because she is a classic hoarder. W07's sister is Janet the Martyr (JtM) because she was the one taking care of Mother when no one else would; even when we offered. JtM's husband is Silent Doug (SD) a nice guy but he never says anything because Jtm does all the talking. LAJ and PRT has a son, Robert-the-Jedi (RtJ) because his parents were heavily into Star Trek/Wars/ sci fi stuff, so RtJ is too.  I'll add more family history later if you want it. LAJ is 63, chronic kidney disease. Goes to dialysis three days a week and lives in Assisted Living because no one can stand living with him.

What’s your special name for yourself? 

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12 hours ago, Scrapr said:

it went from funny to heart breaking pretty quickly

Sadly, that seems to be a regular plot arc in many folks' lives.  Too many folks eventually make enough small errors/mistakes in life that they collapse under the weight of them (the old straw-camel story).  Even when it was "funny", it was already pretty sad, and surely not how most folks see their lives when they are children and have a whole world and decades of life ahead of them. 

Good storytelling of a fairly sad story.

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Over 30 years it was a slow motion train wreck to watch and be powerless to stop. I tried to help but was told to mind my own business, so I did. I remember one time in 1997 or 1998, when Wo7 helped LAJ, PRT, and RtJ move to Orlando. LAJ’s idea was to cure the hoarding by getting PRT to a new location and starting over. Worked until the house they left in Cincinnati froze a water line and flooded the basement. Water, drywall and stacks of paper is a good breeding ground for black mold. Wo7 and her Mom hired a contractor to clean out the house. The fridge was salvageable until it was opened and they saw the milk, cheese and other food left behind when they moved. LAJ never came back to help. They moved back to OH after 5 years in FL and rented a place with the MIL.

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24 minutes ago, Old No. 7 said:

Over 30 years it was a slow motion train wreck to watch and be powerless to stop. I tried to help but was told to mind my own business, so I did.

Help? You did.  But there was no way you or your wife were ever going to "fix" or stop them from going down the paths they have ended up following.  :(  It's tough enough keeping your own life and your immediate family on a relatively straight path, so don't beat yourself up (or think we're beating you up).

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