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Have you ever thought about how drastically different your life might be


Road Runner

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I was discussing the movie Sliding Doors with my sister this weekend.  She had never seen it, but that's the whole concept - how does just missing a train change a person's life.  I suspect there are lots of different turns my life could have taken, but I don't really imagine they're any better (or much worse) - just different.  Even if I'd  changed some choices, I don't think my basic personality would have changed.

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14 minutes ago, Kirby said:

I was discussing the movie Sliding Doors with my sister this weekend.  She had never seen it, but that's the whole concept - how does just missing a train change a person's life.  I suspect there are lots of different turns my life could have taken, but I don't really imagine they're any better (or much worse) - just different.

But you never know.  Just a second or two and my son would have avoided his terrible accident.  But on the other hand, it could have been much worse.  He quite easily could have been killed.  Any of the slightest differences to his schedule or movements that day could have resulted in momentously different outcomes, not only for him but for his family and his as yet unborn children.  

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7 minutes ago, Road Runner said:

But you never know.  Just a second or two and my son would have avoided his terrible accident.  But on the other hand, it could have been much worse.  He quite easily could have been killed.  Any of the slightest differences to his schedule or movements that day would have had momentously different outcomes, not only for him but for his family and his as yet unborn children.  

I try not to think of the butterfly effect.

There's a relationship I tried my darndest to make work in my twenties, someone I'd have willingly died for without a moment's thought. But it takes two to make a relationship. I didn't understand until years later that she didn't understand what love was, and without that, she couldn't hold up her end. I wish both that she could have understood this to tell me, but also that I wasn't so blind as not to see it; it took years of my life and maybe my path would be different.  But there's nothing I can do about it.

I think of my parents, who love me and wanted to do right by me, but growing up and in my teens, didn't always know what would have been right for me. I wasn't encouraged to go after my dreams. I wasn't helped in figuring them out either.  But that's come and gone, and there's no use crying over spilled milk or thinking about what might have been. Better to look at myself now and realize that with God's grace, I managed to figure out a career for myself that, although it had a number of highly toxic steps along the way, eventually landed me in a good place.

I do wish I caught that Ronald Acuna, Jr. foul ball I missed by three feet six weeks ago. Now that's worth being annoyed over. Stupid mask fogged my glasses.

 

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51 minutes ago, Road Runner said:

... if just one seemingly minor occurrence or decision that you experienced early on had not occurred, or had occurred differently, or you had chosen a slightly different path?

Just one minor example:  My son had a bad cycling accident several years ago where a motorist ran a light and hit him broadside at an intersection.  I always think about how just any little thing could have prevented that accident from happening.  Any slight delay before his ride or any slight slowdown or speed up during his ride;  just a second or two either way would have kept that accident from ever happening.  And if that accident never happens, what other new and different directions might his life have taken?     

Every thing sits on top of a branch of a previous chain of events with an infinite number of possibilities on different branches.  At the same time it sits at the bottom of another tree with an infinite number of branches of events yet to come.

You might ponder if all of those other choices became alternate universes    Reference the Butterfly effect posted above, Chaos theory or some very eastern philosophies.

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I had a few close calls.

I had a bullet miss my head by inches and smash through the roof & out a window of a patrol car.  A lot of things went right for that bullet to miss me.

Several years ago I was riding to my cousins house to meet up for a ride. As I approached the intersection a car made a left turn into the path of an oncoming car. In order to avoid the turning car the other car veered hard to the right bounced a curb & smashed into a light pole.  Had I been a bit faster I would have been waiting for that light to turn where that car bounces the curb before hitting the pole.  Good thing I’m slow as it happened about 50’ in front of me instead! 

I also think back to how meeting my wife was such an odd coincidence.  Her best friend in HS enlisted in the army and got stationed where she grew up.  I was in 1st platoon and when I became promotable to Sgt got moved to 4th platoon & this soldier ended up in my squad which prompted the meet up at a party.  Had I got moved to 2nd or 3rd platoon, or promoted sooner or later, or this soldier not get assigned to my squad we would have never met.  It was like the stars aligned.
 

 

 

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58 minutes ago, Road Runner said:

Just think of how different the world might be if Herr Hitler's sperm had been just a little less enthusiastic on the night of Adolf's conception.  Or if Frau Hitler had a really bad headache that night.    

I always think about how we would have totally different childrens depending on the number of times I had sex or the month my wife got pregnant. A weird thought. 

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6 hours ago, sheep_herder said:

These types of thoughts have never crossed my mind. I am the type that deals in the here and now, and have pretty much always been this way. 

Other than contemplating the possibilities, this is the only real way we have of dealing with the universe.  No one knows what would have resulted if only things had been slightly different back then but one thing is sure.  We wouldn't be who we are today.

I'll run with what I've got, for better or worse, it's who I am.

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7 hours ago, sheep_herder said:

These types of thoughts have never crossed my mind. I am the type that deals in the here and now, and have pretty much always been this way. 

I wish this is how I viewed life. While I do indeed (as I’m sure we all do) deal with and live life in the present with the present circumstances, I have spent a fair amount of time contemplating the ‘what ifs’ In life; wondering how different things might have been.

But who we are reflects the culmination of our life experiences at any given point in time. And our state of being is always in flux. 

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7 hours ago, Philander Seabury said:

I always think about how we would have totally different childrens depending on the number of times I had sex or the month my wife got pregnant. A weird thought. 

I wonder what our lives would have been like if my wife would have been able to have children. How many children would we have had? We were blessed with the boys we adopted and I would have hated to miss that experience. I have fantastic sons and grandkids, I don’t think we could have done any better. I would have liked to have raised a little Esther but it wasn’t to be.

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I don't overthink it but these were critical points in my life:

*What if I was born in China and my parents never immigrated to Canada?  I've thought of this when I met adult immigrant relatives and know how different their lives were. Some of you say just live in the now. Well true, but as a CAnadian-born I'm glad I don't take my life for granted being naturalized citizen.

*I met dearie at a computer maintenance evening course at a public school 30 yrs. ago.  I barely could concentrate in that course because of him.  My life took a different course, even where I ended up living in Canada and even the jobs I had after I moved with him.

*When I had my concussion when cyclist crashed into me. What if I had memory of the traumatic crash?  I was incredibly lucky I had no memory of it.  I did lose my short-term memory for a few hrs. Or my concussion was worse than me taking 5 months to recover. 

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1 hour ago, Longjohn said:

I wonder what our lives would have been like if my wife would have been able to have children. How many children would we have had? We were blessed with the boys we adopted and I would have hated to miss that experience. I have fantastic sons and grandkids, I don’t think we could have done any better. I would have liked to have raised a little Esther but it wasn’t to be.

But, you and she did have children. You were both put into this place and time to raise the sons you did and to see your grandchildren who will never view either of you as anything other than their grandparents. 

The world sorely needs people who would do what you two have done, LJ. And what greater way to reflect the heart of the Father than to embrace children as your own and pour your heart and soul into them. 

My hat’s off to you.

Peace.

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6 hours ago, Zealot said:

But, you and she did have children. You were both put into this place and time to raise the sons you did and to see your grandchildren who will never view either of you as anything other than their grandparents. 

The world sorely needs people who would do what you two have done, LJ. And what greater way to reflect the heart of the Father than to embrace children as your own and pour your heart and soul into them. 

My hat’s off to you.

Peace.

POTD. 

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