bright kid, sedate life so far?

[shootingstar]

So she just graduated from 4 yrs. undergrad program..and will be entering into Faculty of Medicine at university.  She is 16 yrs. old.  She credits her grandmother, who used to be schoolteacher, but somehow would say / do things that were fun to her as child, but was teaching her stuff. I'm certain her grandma is a low-key, but determined person.

To me, she does seem like bright kid and just leading not a wild life. (At her age, I related to her attitude..the overplayed perception life is about parties, getting drunk. When people said stuff like that ...as a teen I just couldn't relate. I couldn't see joy in getting drunk.)

Does she lead a dull life so far (she gets to go to China/overseas) and missing out on sex, etc.?  Honest, it's not the end of the world at her age. Not even into early 20's. As long as she has a variety of good friends, that's really most important in terms of her well-being and development.

 

Xie says she was never pressured to excel in school. She says has always gone about learning at her own speed, including acknowledging that when her studies didn't challenge her, she had to challenge herself.

"You just kind of have to really give yourself time and space to do things at your own pace. It's not like a race," she explained. 

She says despite being a strong student, she enjoys other activities like creative writing and food.

"People say, 'Don't be a jack of all trades, start specializing.' But for me, I think that's terrible advice," she said.

"When all you know how to use is a hammer, you're going to see everything else is a nail ... I feel like that's a terrible way to approach life."

She says being well rounded helps her. Besides her academic success, she is certain of one thing — her desire to live life drives her. 

"All of these incredible, incredible coincidences happened for us to be able to exist right now. And then you throw it away and that's going to be like such a waste. Just have fun and really, really enjoy the time that you have on Earth," she said. 

[Airehead]

I wonder who her friends are. Learning to navigate social norms is also important. 

[shootingstar]

28 minutes ago, Airehead said:

I wonder who her friends are. Learning to navigate social norms is also important. 

Hard to know since yes, she was in university with much older people around her.  Under those circumstances it's good to have at least 1 good, long term friend closer to her age...starting before she entered university.  

I know what you're saying:  I have another niece (who is alot younger than the romance writer, ex-engineer) who is 17 yrs.old and ever since she was a kid she enjoys the company, long conversations with adults. In fact, at recess she always glommed on talking with the teachers, not playing with her peers at all. She was bored by her peers.  It concerned her mother, my sister because daughter didn't have 1 close female friend her age as a buddy. When I last saw niece 3 yrs. ago, she was so natural and mature holding a conversation with myself and dearie....2 adults she only saw every few years. In a way, we're practically strangers to her since I see her so seldom since living in another province.

Sister's last complaint to me 2 months ago, was her 17 yr. old daughter talking like 20 yr. old.  I'll bet from the back of her mind, as a parent, the biggest concern is a guy alot older than her while still in her teens, appearing via the Internet/whatever, expressing interest.  Lest, guys here think I'm crazy:  Sorry, I  knew very bright high school girls my age @18-19 yrs., dating guys 10-15 yrs. older.  2 of them got pregnant too early.  These girls were very erudite, intellectual ...but I guess not enough to stop other stuff.

Sorry....a very bright female...deserve several years of space to develop intellectually.... before getting pregnant too early.

[Prophet Zacharia]

17 minutes ago, Airehead said:

I wonder who her friends are. Learning to navigate social norms is also important. 

I wouldn’t want to skip high school as social learning experience, or go through it was a pre-teen, or graduate college at age 16. I am glad she completed a more diverse liberal arts degree rather than a combined BS/MD program, but feel that she missed a lot of the life experience that college provides by going through at such a young age. 

[shootingstar]

26 minutes ago, Prophet Zacharia said:

I wouldn’t want to skip high school as social learning experience, or go through it was a pre-teen, or graduate college at age 16. I am glad she completed a more diverse liberal arts degree rather than a combined BS/MD program, but feel that she missed a lot of the life experience that college provides by going through at such a young age. 

She sounds not as a geeky as one would expect at this time. There was a Korean-Canadian girl my age in high school...she was incredibly bright..but she NEVER socialized with any of us girls...and we were academically bright and some (like me), kinda conservative upbringing, not into partying (because my parents were strict) but at least we did all the normal girl stuff with some feminist bent. Hemmie, instead hung around with the geek boys into the debating team, math and science.

She did graduate with MA/Phd in biochemistry, then got her law degree. She is an intellectual property law lawyer somewhere in the Boston area.

My high school yrs...were not partying... If you knew me then....I was a reserved, good kid. Loved my artwork and creative writing/poetry. I had a best friend who was very popular but academically good also. So that was where I was hooked into the popular/partying crowd via their stories.

I'm still the person not comfortable going into bars.  What's the point, I'm abit allergic to alcohol..

 

[Dottleshead ★]

16 hours ago, Prophet Zacharia said:

I wouldn’t want to skip high school as social learning experience, or go through it was a pre-teen, or graduate college at age 16. I am glad she completed a more diverse liberal arts degree rather than a combined BS/MD program, but feel that she missed a lot of the life experience that college provides by going through at such a young age. 

100000%

[JerrySTL ★]

I had the chance to graduate from high school at age 16 by skipping 2 years. I'm glad that I didn't. Even when I graduated at 18 years old, I felt too immature to go to college. I'd probably would have partied too much and ruined my chance at a good education. It's one of the major reasons that I joined the military instead of going to college back then.

[shootingstar]

54 minutes ago, JerrySTL said:

I had the chance to graduate from high school at age 16 by skipping 2 years. I'm glad that I didn't. Even when I graduated at 18 years old, I felt too immature to go to college. I'd probably would have partied too much and ruined my chance at a good education. It's one of the major reasons that I joined the military instead of going to college back then.

I'm abit lost in all this:

• I didn't realize partying was supposed to be formative part of my development.  I never went to any parties where there was booze when I was a teen. But then, I wasn't allowed
• Off campus, I went to 2 parties  a non-profit organization threw for their volunteers.
• Yea, I guess I went to 1-3 mini parties at university...at someone's apartment.  Then when I graduated with my 2nd degree ..I went out with 50+ of us to some restaurant.
• I went to university for 5 years in total.

My university years ..alot of it was quite lonely/solitary. It really was....doing a degree in English literature in late 1970's onward, where I went (not Toronto), there was no one else of colour in undergraduate class of my year of 150 students.  I don't think alot folks even realize what being visible minority even means or occasionally what it feels like.  It shouldn't matter, but university can be intense, isolating and it helps to have friends. Yea, other students were ok....just distant.  I just couldn't relate to them. Then we all disperse across campus after each class to our own lives.

 I wasn't part of the dorm parties or anything because I never lived on campus.  Too expensive.  In my final year I lived at graduate student apartment complex. Various students already married / with children. My graduate/master's year was better...buddied up with 2 gals who are still each long-time friends.  No, none of us, went out to drink for girls' night. No, they are white.

Just so people understand....there were very few Asians in my high school (of 2,000 students).so I knew most of them also weren't part of the party-hardy groups. They were like me, from immigrant working class families working in restaurants.  My closest best friend...was white, very popular but academic.   Looking back, it's kinda of interesting we had such a strong long friendship.  I was her maid of honour at her lst wedding.

Yes, I know I'm boring.  However I feel very lucky  I've had, to me, an incredible life so far..without much partying and getting drunk.

Anyway, back to the original post:   the young lady finishing her undergrad at 16 yrs., seems pretty normal to me. As long as she has a best friend around her age...she'll be fine.  

 

[Prophet Zacharia]

3 hours ago, shootingstar said:

I didn't realize partying was supposed to be formative part

It’s not what I meant by social development. Yes, some people do that in college, some don’t do it much, if at all. But there are other aspects of personal growth associated with the college experience that I think are benefited from having a similar age to your peers. And there are obviously different ways to develop after high school, college is just one.

I’m sure this young woman will be fine. But it’s not how I would have developed best, and that’s probably true for many others (but obviously not all). 

[shootingstar]

54 minutes ago, Prophet Zacharia said:

It’s not what I meant by social development. Yes, some people do that in college, some don’t do it much, if at all. But there are other aspects of personal growth associated with the college experience that I think are benefited from having a similar age to your peers. And there are obviously different ways to develop after high school, college is just one.

I’m sure this young woman will be fine. But it’s not how I would have developed best, and that’s probably true for many others (but obviously not all). 

the more worrying part right now...is covid has truly downgraded that experience for all school kids and even university.  My niece was confined to her dorm room..in another city. Very expensive educational experience.  Her brother lived in same city but off-campus with some room mates. Again limiting, with distance remote online classes.

My brother-in-law a prof. in engineering, does not enjoy teaching his online classes but he has to.

[Razors Edge ★]

21 hours ago, Prophet Zacharia said:

I’m sure this young woman will be fine. But it’s not how I would have developed best, and that’s probably true for many others (but obviously not all). 

Yeah, with 7,000,000,000+ folks in the world, I'm gonna weigh in that this young woman is just a drop in the ocean of interesting things folks are doing in the world around us.  Most (all) of us take different paths through our lives, and the most "normal" are still completely unique.  Viva la difference.