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1 in 5 married men... 1 in 6 married women... where do you stand?


Dottleshead

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If you accept this study... you old folks want excitement I guess.

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In general, men are more likely than women to cheat: 20% of men and 13% of women reported that they’ve had sex with someone other than their spouse while married, according to data from the recent General Social Survey(GSS).

 

https://ifstudies.org/blog/who-cheats-more-the-demographics-of-cheating-in-america#:~:text=also means infidelity.-,In general%2C men are more likely than women to cheat,General Social Survey(GSS).

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If more men cheat than women who are the men cheating with? I'm thinking (1) unmarried women, (2) other men, or (3) some of the married women cheat with more men. Probably some combination of those three or something else that I'm missing.

I haven't cheated in the 47 years that we've been together and I doubt that I will start.

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10 minutes ago, JerrySTL said:

If more men cheat than women who are the men cheating with? I'm thinking (1) unmarried women, (2) other men, or (3) some of the married women cheat with more men. Probably some combination of those three or something else that I'm missing.

I haven't cheated in the 47 years that we've been together and I doubt that I will start.

One doesn't see a lot of cheating in marriages that have lasted almost 50 years.  Hmmm...........I wonder if there is a message there.

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Does this count?

When I collapsed at the grocery store and wife finally reached me by phone in the ER, I told her my girlfriend found out that I had a wife, beat me up and I ended up in the ER! :o

Doesn't that sound lot better than "passed out at Publix?" 

After being marries for close to 50 years (Saturday will be 49) and no affairs, you can get by with a BS statement like that. She knows I've made a fine art of giving absurd "off the wall" answers.

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37 minutes ago, Wilbur said:

I don't know.  My lesbian niece has been divorced twice.  That may really skew your numbers.  :) 

My wife's sister has been married to her wife for over 20 years not counting their courtship.  I have no idea if either one has cheated but I know this -- 20 years of marriage for anybody is a remarkable achievement.  I'm going on 10 years in February and i got a late start with my wife.  We started together and we'll finish together.

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3 hours ago, Dottles said:

My wife's sister has been married to her wife for over 20 years not counting their courtship.  I have no idea if either one has cheated but I know this -- 20 years of marriage for anybody is a remarkable achievement.  I'm going on 10 years in February and i got a late start with my wife.  We started together and we'll finish together.

I was with dearie for 29 yrs. We were common-law.. We stood the test of time....multiple tests of distance. There are probably alot more couples (who are married) like our situation....living hundreds/thousands of kms. apart for awhile, primarily because of jobs. And spending time in person in various locations. People just don't talk much about it to others.

The main reason to get married is legal access to various govn't benefits, property, parental responsibility for children, etc. And for some people that might trump over simply dedicated monogamous love from the heart/religious reasons.  Of course a wedding band, doesn't stop cheating.

If a person is aware of this, one just simply structures finances accordingly.

I knew of a woman at work who had 5 children..then she and her spouse finally decided to get married. She adopted his last name, etc. She was already in her 50's.  :flirtyeyess:Since her situation was children with her guy, it is better to marry.

Meanwhile I still have to clear out my closets of his clothing, over 10 prs. of shoes, boots in prairie city. I've been doing this slowly..gave away his ergonomic keyboard to a good friend here. It's too wide for my use.

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It would hard  to match dearie...we were solely dedicated to each other right to the end. We used to joke we talked waaaaay longer daily by video than in person.  Including my lunch breaks and evenings, we would be talking 1.5 - 2 hrs. daily.  But then in person, it was sharing other stuff. :) 

Though he is gone  and I am sad, I am also uplifted by his love he shared with me because it was never tainted by any cheating.  It is my strongest advice for anyone who is struggling with their marriage.  You want to die with your love that you gave ..as the best.

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I joke, tease, and chat with the guys but I've never had a reason to cheat. 

Let me see, spend a couple hundred on a date to get sex from another woman when I'm pretty sure Gina's better at it anyway. 😄

Guess I'm lucky because Gina's the sexiest woman that ever walked this earth with the sweetest kindest disposition. I first saw her walking away and right away noticed the booty shake. I was hooked. 😆

How can I lose, with what she use?

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On 6/28/2022 at 2:12 AM, Dottles said:

If you accept this study... you old folks want excitement I guess.

Wouldn't older folks just have more time (opportunity) to cheat?  Certainly would seem that someone married 40 years would have had more chances to cheat than someone married 1 or 5 or 10 years?

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1 hour ago, Razors Edge said:

Wouldn't older folks just have more time (opportunity) to cheat?  Certainly would seem that someone married 40 years would have had more chances to cheat than someone married 1 or 5 or 10 years?

Wouldn't it be more of some folks not making the effort to accept and reinvigorate their marriage ...but in a slightly different way after 30, 40 yrs. together?  Individuals change abit and therefore it can affect an intimate relationship.  In my opinion women become smarter over time, ..which might account for older women not wasting more time in unfulfilling relationships. It's not that they cheat less, they just don't bother anymore over the years because of xxxxx.   Perhaps the question should be asked the other way, what percentage of single women are involved in an extra-marital affair.  Same to ask of single men. 

The above graph focuses only on married folks. 

It wouldn't surprise me, women who have been single for several decades, might refrain from getting involved with a married guy. There's a ton of baggage already even BEFORE one hops into bed.

After awhile, you can sense a guy who ....doesn't give a shit in the end.

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9 minutes ago, shootingstar said:

Wouldn't it be more of some folks not making the effort to accept and reinvigorate their marriage ...but in a slightly different way after 30, 40 yrs. together?  Individuals change abit and therefore it can affect an intimate relationship.  In my opinion women become smarter over time, ..which might account for older women not wasting more time in unfulfilling relationships. It's not that they cheat less, they just don't bother anymore over the years because of xxxxx.   Perhaps the question should be asked the other way, what percentage of single women are involved in an extra-marital affair.  Same to ask of single men. 

The above graph focuses only on married folks. 

It wouldn't surprise me, women who have been single for several decades, might refrain from getting involved with a married guy. There's a ton of baggage already even BEFORE one hops into bed.

After awhile, you can sense a guy who ....doesn't give a shit in the end.

If you are driving for one year, you might have 15,000 miles of "exposure" to having an accident. After 40 yrs of driving, you'd have 600,000 miles of "exposure" to an accident.  My feeling is folks early in marriage will have "spike" in cheaters, but then, after folks settle in, they will likely just be confronted with a longer period of time to cheat.   

To some degree, I think men are "luckier" than women as they often get more "attractive" as they age - usually because of power and money - so a married guy might have more options than married woman (especially in later years) to cheat.

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It may also be true that men are more likely to believe that reporting they cheated makes them look more masculine so a higher percentage of men claim to cheat than really occurs.  It may also true that a higher percentage of women lie and say they didn't cheat!

I have a very pretty cousin who confided to me that her son is not her husband's son and that the real father was an older neighbor now deceased.  Her mother and sister also know and I guess others, too, but all of us have been sworn not to tell her husband.  Her son graduated with a degree in accounting and business management, is still in his mid-20's and is making about $150K/year.  I hope he thinks his father is his biological father and takes care of him, now in his 60's.

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46 minutes ago, MickinMD said:

It may also be true that men are more likely to believe that reporting they cheated makes them look more masculine so a higher percentage of men claim to cheat than really occurs.  It may also true that a higher percentage of women lie and say they didn't cheat!

I have a very pretty cousin who confided to me that her son is not her husband's son and that the real father was an older neighbor now deceased.  Her mother and sister also know and I guess others, too, but all of us have been sworn not to tell her husband.  Her son graduated with a degree in accounting and business management, is still in his mid-20's and is making about $150K/year.  I hope he thinks his father is his biological father and takes care of him, now in his 60's.

A secret that huge is hard to hold back forever.  One day....maybe much later in future, he will be told.

It will be his mother to be blamed/held accountable for not revealing truth, actually from ... hubby (if told before he dies) and son. I'm sorry...there are enough real stories.

Edited by shootingstar
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