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I have to write an abstract


Parr8hed
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Ah, you actually have no idea and are fishing for suggestions.

Not far off there.

 

I am writing an abstract about BMI and how it correlates to our number of organs procured per donor.  My working title is "It's hard to win the Kentucky Derby with a 3 legged horse."

 

I am basically trying to do something along the lines of "we get a lot of heavy donors and don't hate us for that" but not really sure where to go.  I think I might need to find a way to fix the problem to write this abstract?

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is fucking everything harvesting organs with you? :P

Well here's the story Nancy.

 

I harvest procure organs for work.  If I am going to write something for work, guess what it's going to fucking be about?  Not the ignition timing on a Chevrolet 350 I can guaran-damn-tee you that.

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Well...are you going to work BACON into the story?  And as part of your presentation...pass out some BACON and you might just win the prize for the best presentation...After all isn't BACON a factor with BMI   :D  TA DA  I think I helped you write your abstract :P

I hope i don't have to give a presentation.  Actually I hope that they don't like my abstract.  I am just doing it because the boss thinks it's a good idea that I do it.

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I'm guessing it is about BMI and how it correlates to the number of organs procured per donor.  Close?

Yep pretty much it exactly.  I can tell you that the higher the BMI, the fewer organs per donor we obtain.  I don't think that's exactly a prize winning insight though.  I need someplace to go from there.

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.

...how about changing it into a PR campaign concept.  Your slogan could be, "Stop stuffing your pie holes, you fat fucks !"

well that's what i would like to do but not sure that the company would get behind my message.  Well, out in the public anyway.

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.  I can tell you that the higher the BMI, the fewer organs per donor we obtain.  I don't think that's exactly a prize winning insight though.

 

I can tell you it's prize winning insight enough that I'm going to start eating all kinds of donuts and fried foods in hopes I decrease the chances of waking up in a tub full of ice in a hotel somewhere.

 

Again.

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The obesity epidemic might influence liver transplantation program even further by reducing the number of available organs because of increased fatty infiltration (steatosis) of the donor livers, but so far one study could not demonstrate that donor BMI affected primary graft nonfunction and re-transplantation rates using whole organs [21]. In times of relative organ-scarcity we must conclude that obesity may be considered a relative contra- indication to liver transplantation both on a short-term and long-term basis, although a regressive attitude in gen- eral toward elective surgery in obese patients no longer seems justified [22].

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Not far off there.
 
I am writing an abstract about BMI and how it correlates to our number of organs procured per donor.  My working title is "It's hard to win the Kentucky Derby with a 3 legged horse."
 
I am basically trying to do something along the lines of "we get a lot of heavy donors and don't hate us for that" but not really sure where to go.  I think I might need to find a way to fix the problem to write this abstract?


As a person on the outside and knowing little about the industry, I cannot relate the title to the subject. Can you relate the Kentucky Derby and horses with organ donations for me please?
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As a person on the outside and knowing little about the industry, I cannot relate the title to the subject. Can you relate the Kentucky Derby and horses with organ donations for me please?

Ok, sure. 

 

So think of the Ky Derby as a mostly unobtainable goal.  Our (we meaning Organ Procurement Organizations) try to provide enough organs to meet the need of the number of people on the transplant list.  Our number of organs provided can grow in 2 ways really.  1. Get more donors.  So this is really not feasible.  We can't just go out whacking people to get organs. And we already have a pretty dang high success rate at asking people to become donors (79 percent of people say yes).

2.  Get more organs out of each donor.  Our governing bodies have set a goal of 3.75 av organs per donor to be obtained.  That's a pretty lofty goal. 

 

So if you think of the effort to achieve this lofty goal of 3.75 OPD then it's not hard to equate that to running a race.  Since I work mainly in KY it's easy to equate that to the derby.

 

Now here's where it get's tricky because my intent is certainly not to insult our donors.  These are great people with loving families that have given the gift of donation so that others can live.  But this state is certainly known for smoking, obesity and just poor health in general.

 

So my crude working title is really a joke, I would never publish that title publicly.  But you give us a lofty goal of 3.75 OPD and then give us a very unhealthy donor population and you can equate that to winning the derby with a 3 legged horse.

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Ok, so these donors, who are in poor health, are not really viable donors due to damaged organs?

Due to their lifestyle, they not only are killing themselves, but taking others with them - that could have benefited from their donations.

Now I understand The American peoples' aversion to guvment "control" but it seems to me that if government would like higher organ harvesting ( I really don't like that word) then they would have to somehow influence the KY population to become healthier. I think anyone who exercises and lives a healthy lifestyle realize that taxes invested into the health of people, costs less than the monies paid out into health care trying to keep a damaged body working.

Preventative maintenance.

So you need these governing bodies (I'm assuming this is state guvment?) to help you, to help them and the American people.

So could an angle to a title be worked around that?

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Ok, so these donors, who are in poor health, are not really viable donors due to damaged organs?



Due to their lifestyle, they not only are killing themselves, but taking others with them - that could have benefited from their donations.



Now I understand The American peoples' aversion to guvment "control" but it seems to me that if government would like higher organ harvesting ( I really don't like that word) then they would have to somehow influence the KY population to become healthier. I think anyone who exercises and lives a healthy lifestyle realize that taxes invested into the health of people, costs less than the monies paid out into health care trying to keep a damaged body working.



Preventative maintenance.



So you need these governing bodies (I'm assuming this is state guvment?) to help you, to help them and the American people.



So could an angle to a title be worked around that?

​Glad you don't like "Harvest".  We now say "Procurement" in the industry. 

Slippery slope.  Trying to get the gubment to tell us how to live so we can save other's lives in the event of our untimely demise.  But I certainly see where you are coming from.

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