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Do you bite your tongue?

Square Wheels

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About once a month I'll get the inside of my cheek with my molars. I don't know why this happens but I've bitten them so hard you can hear the crunch/tear of skin.  Hurts like a muther too.  Sometimes I'll have skin hanging from the inside of my cheek for a day or two afterwards. 

I seldom get my tongue or lip though. 

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True story.  Back in Jr. High, you could open you locker by "popping" it.  This involved placing your finger in lock latch and popping it hard without putting in the combo.  If done right, the door would spring open.  All the young studs just knew they could impress the young maidens by popping their locker for them.

Image result for school locker lock











So one day, I went to pop a locker twas on the upper level.  To do this, you stood on the locks of the lower two lockers, held the handle of one locker with one hand and used your free hand to pop the locker.  So up I climb, and I popped the locker, no problem, except for the fact that I had my tongue between my teeth and when the locker door sprang open, it hit me in the chin.  Yep, bit a hole clean through my tongue.

I was pouring blood.  Went to the bathroom and kept washing my mouth out to stop the bleeding.  It did not work.  So I got some paper towels, shoved them in my mouth and went to the office.  Told the secretary that I had bit a hole in tongue.  Well I tried to, but with a mouthful of paper towels and blood I think I said "uh bith a hul inma tun".  After several attempts, I spit a mouthful of blood into her trash can and told I her I bit a hole in my tongue.

She calls my mom, who leaves her office, at a hospital to come get my dumb ass and carry me to our doctor to get sewn up.  She was not happy.

I can tell you I will never forget having my tongue pulled out of my mouth by a nurse using forceps while the doc shot it full of novocaine and sewed it up with a wicked ass curved needle right in front of my eyes.

So yeah, I bite my tongue, what's it to ya?"!

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