When the troubles of this life weigh you down

[jsharr ★]

what do you do to reenergize?

Having a hard time finding joy in the small things right now.  Just feel grey inside.  I am pretty sure I know the whys but not sure how to get to a happier place.  

I have tons of things that need to be done and I have no desire to do any of them.

Sorry for the whine.  Thanks for listening.

[petitepedal ★]

Walk....a long walk...just by yourself... and push yourself at the pace ..no not running or speed walking..but enough that you get that heart pumping...while you walk..think about what is weighing you down...and think about your blessings...try for a 45 to 60 minute walk...at a park or reserve if possible..

I find nature...a good pace...by myself gives me time to clear my heart and soul..

[UglyBob]

I usually do one of two things. The first is going to sound a little trite considering what this forum is supposedly about, but I go for a ride. It gives my body something to do while my brain sorts thing out. If I'm having a particularly bad day, I push myself to the edge of total exhaustion. The other thing I do sometimes is grab my camera and head down a dirt road I've never taken before. Sometimes finding a new place to think gives you a new perspective on things.

[Square Wheels]

When I was at my lowest, and I've been pretty low, I meditated.  It helped me a lot.  I also talked on the phone (I was locked up at the time) to a friend daily.  She helped me a lot.  I looked forward to our calls.

[Road Runner]

What works for me is to just try to go with the flow.  If I am a little depressed about things and unenthused,  I just try to relax and accept it, do nothing even.  The things you "need" to do can probably wait, most of them anyway.  Give yourself a break.  Getting upset over being depressed or down just makes it a lot worse.  Do some stuff that makes you happy.  In a few days, you will probably feel better and then you can tackle all those things that you "need" to do.  Just my experience, of course.  Hope you feel better soon.     

[Ralphie ★]

Unsticking yourself is not easily done.

Damn, effed that up!  This is what I meant,

Dr. Seuss > Quotes > Quotable Quote

“When you're in a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done.”

[Road Runner]

Also, what works for one may not work for others.  

My neurosurgeon recently told me, "Everybody is different."  He went to medical school so he knows what he is talking about.   

[Wilbur ★]

The desire part is where the issue is.  It is possible you suffer from depression but IMO and experience, it is more likely a symptom of ADHD or ADD.  Get yourself tested.  I have ADHD for real and in my case, it enhances my job performance.  For many, it doesn't.  My daughters both have it and both take meds for it.  Both experienced tremendous improvements in school and work performance and both lost weight.  

Get yourself checked out and if needed, treated.  That means all your personalities.  Except AHA.  I like her how she is. :). 

Oh, no self treatment either. 

[JerrySTL ★]

Long walk or a bike ride.

Sometimes just cleaning out the garage or doing some car maintenance like changing the oil or brake pads helps also.

[Kirby]

Depends on if I can figure out what is causing me to feel down.  Most often it's work, and feeling stressed and overtired from work.  In that case, trying to focus on when the project that is causing me stress will be done - and coming up with some mini-rewards for along the way.  When I'm over tired and haven't gotten enough sleep, I tend to react more strongly to things - little things can cause me to feel upset.  So if I'm on edge, I really try to get a good night's sleep.

Taking a nice long, slow walk in a pretty setting also helps. Something to just take me out of the situation.

If you think it may be something more than a normal "out of sorts" and that there may be a medical link, get it checked out with the right professional.  Sometimes that can make all the difference.

[Frank Calico Cat]

Our love and admiration is not enough?  

[tybeegb]

Not a lot of help here from me.  I go through this often.  I just don't do anything that doesn't REALLY need to be done, like a water leak; and I have a lot of things to do but they can wait.  I'll get to them, later.  I don't get down on myself.  I've worked hard to get to this "don't have to do anything I don't want to do" stage.  If I'm not enthused about doing anything, I don't do anything.  It's no big deal. 

But, when I do get the urge, I'm hell on wheels until I get un-enthused again.  It all evens out.        

[jsharr ★]

5 hours ago, Wilbur said:

The desire part is where the issue is.  It is possible you suffer from depression but IMO and experience, it is more likely a symptom of ADHD or ADD.  Get yourself tested.  I have ADHD for real and in my case, it enhances my job performance.  For many, it doesn't.  My daughters both have it and both take meds for it.  Both experienced tremendous improvements in school and work performance and both lost weight.  

Get yourself checked out and if needed, treated.  That means all your personalities.  Except AHA.  I like her how she is. :). 

Oh, no self treatment either. 

I think you hit the nail right on the     

SQUIRREL!!!!

[Square Wheels]

5 minutes ago, jsharr said:

I think you hit the nail right on the     

SQUIRREL!!!!

Yes?

[jsharr ★]

So I sent out some Scout emails about Camporee

Cleaned the garage a bit.

Sharpened the the chain on the Poulan and got the right fuel for the Stihl and the boys and I cut up more of the fallen tree into firewood

Talked to Martha about getting into a specialist about my ADD / ADHD

This too shall pass and my blessings always outweigh my demons

Remember in Gullivers Travels where the Lilliputians tie Gulliver down.  I am Gulliver and I tend to produce my own Lilliputians and I let them tie me down.  It is a cyclical thing and I happens most often when I feel over extended or out of control.

[Green Grass]

2 minutes ago, jsharr said:

 

This too shall pass and my blessings always outweigh my demons

 

I trust this is true.  You are a good dude, jsharr.  

[Green Grass]

6 hours ago, Square Wheels said:

 (I was locked up at the time) 

 

[Thaddeus Kosciuszko]

14 minutes ago, jsharr said:

I feel over extended or out of control

I would suggest you look at all the things that make you feel overextended or out of control and put them into three categories:

-what you can control

-what you can influence

-and what is beyond your control or influence

For each group pick the three things that concern you the most.  Picking more than that can overwhelm you and discourage you into giving up.

Look at each of these concerns and tell yourself they will be solved in due time.  In the iPhone/Twitter/amazon.com world in which we live, we can come to expect all problems must be solved at the speed of electronic devices and social media.

For what you can control, consider how your abilities and talents - which have done so well for you before - will now help you resolve each of these concerns.  You have the skills, it's a matter of applying the right ones with patience to clear up the issues.

For what you can influence, consider to what extent your abilities and talents will influence the issue - then set that as your expectation.  Not that you will or can solve the problem, but that through your influence you can minimize any negative or deleterious impact.

For what is beyond your control, do not waste energy worrying.  Instead expend that energy in making contingency plans to deal in the best possible way with what you think is the most probably outcome.  Pick the most probable outcome, because you can grind yourself down with every 'what if'.  I think you'll be surprised how easily the plan for the most probable outcome can be adapted on the fly to what really occurs.

With this, you've got a plan to handle the 9 biggest problems/concerns in your life.  Notice I said 'handle'.  You won't have them solved yet, but you're on the way.

This, I think, is a big step in getting past the feeling of being overextended or out of control.  If you feel yourself winding up, then go back to your plan, check it.  Make changes if you need to, but remember all the talents and abilities that got you this far this successfully in life will help you be successful with each of these concerns too.

If three in each category is too much, then start with one.  Who knows, maybe once you do this you'll realize you don't even have nine concerns worth putting on a list.

Or if you happen to be a real anal-retentive engineer type , then pick five for each category.

My apologies for the long post.  But in my varied jobs I've had to handle up to 100 projects at one time, which ranged from as simple as installing an outlet to as complex as building a test facility in six weeks.  I found this method of triage helped me manage my time and resources most efficiently, helped me direct my energies and abilities to where they had the greatest effect, and kept the feelings of being overwhelmed and out of control from paralyzing my mind and affecting my health.

One neat thing about it is when you've solved a problem or knocked a concern off your initial list, any problem you put in its place is a smaller/easier problem because you've listed the hardest ones first.  It's a downhill-with-a-tailwind ride from there.

[BuffJim]

I think I have adult ADD. Never occurred to me to seek treatment for it. 

If I get a poor nights sleep I get the blahs. Other than that, I always seem to have something to look forward to that keeps me upbeat. 

[Airehead]

TK gives sage advice.  I don't really have any but I do know reaching out to people even your imaginary friends here is helpful.  

[Further]

[jsharr ★]

23 minutes ago, Airehead said:

TK gives sage advice.  I don't really have any but I do know reaching out to people even your imaginary friends here is helpful.  

All of you are real.  Some more than others.

[jsharr ★]

22 minutes ago, Further said:

Cute butterfly avatar, lady

[LoneWolf]

9 hours ago, jsharr said:

what do you do to reenergize?

When the troubles of this life weigh me down...I go...downtown.

(dedicated to Cheese)

 

[The_Karen_Cooper_Incident]

I get outside of myself, and help someone else.

You know how to contact me, Jsharr.  You are more than welcome to call me.

Rick

[Randomguy]

13 hours ago, LoneWolf said:

When the troubles of this life weigh me down...I go...downtown.

(dedicated to Cheese)

 

I was just about to post this, too!  Good thing I decided to read all replies first!

[Randomguy]

I don't know that I have answers for any of this stuff, really.  I have a lot going on right now that is bumming me the hell out, and a lot that is hard to manage because I am overwhelmed by it, and this is really unprecedented for me.   So much I can't control, not that I really have a need to always be in control or anything, but I wish there was a thing or two that I could right now.  I mostly just breathe, look for a couple of things I am thankful for, and tell myself that things as they are are temporary.  

A lot will lift away when my situation and circumstance change, but I am worried about lasting affects of being in a hole for so long.  I suppose you could be thankful you aren't in my position, that should cheer you up!