Jump to content

My theory about state capitals


AirwickWithCheese

Recommended Posts

If you take the very best a state has to offer, add her worst, then divided exactly in half to get the average for that state, you usually end up with the state capital. 

South Carolina.  

Greenville + Spartanburg/Orangeburg = Columbia. 

One more to underscore my genius. This one is very challenging.

Georgia

Savannah/Augusta/Macon + Atlanta =Atlanta

  • Heart 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, dotman17 said:

Yeah, I can't say that.  Olympia, WA is better than half.  It's not awesome sauce but it's somewhere in the top third.

I appreciate your opinion, but you'd be wrong. My formula always works. Georgia is somewhat skewed because her worst is also her capital but it wasn't always that way. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

I appreciate your opinion, but you'd be wrong. My formula always works. Georgia is somewhat skewed because her worst is also her capital but it wasn't always that way. 

I have made Virginia, North Carolina and Florida.  I have never been to either South Carolina nor Georgia -- though I have a strong desire to.  It's just hard for me to get to that part of the country.  

  • Heart 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, dotman17 said:

I have made Virginia, North Carolina and Florida.  I have never been to either South Carolina nor Georgia -- though I have a strong desire to.  It's just hard for me to get to that part of the country.  

Then you will certainly enjoy Lydia's USA in a Cabriolet series. The highlight of course will be my Greenville. 

God created the earth in 6 days. He spent all of friday working on just Greenville.  :slow-dance-smiley:

  • Heart 2
  • Envious 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

Then you will certainly enjoy Lydia's USA in a Cabriolet series. The highlight of course will be my Greenville. 

God created the earth in 6 days. He spent all of friday working on just Greenville.  :slow-dance-smiley:

If I had to go east... I'd go somewhere in NC or Virginia -- possibly Georgia.  You would not see me anywhere in New England.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

19 minutes ago, dotman17 said:

If I had to go east... I'd go somewhere in NC or Virginia -- possibly Georgia.  You would not see me anywhere in New England.

still sore about that stupid play call in the Super Bowl? 

 

  • Heart 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

Then you will certainly enjoy Lydia's USA in a Cabriolet series. The highlight of course will be my Greenville. 

God created the earth in 6 days. He spent all of friday working on just Greenville Indiana.  :slow-dance-smiley:

Fixed it for you.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

If you take the very best a state has to offer, add her worst, then divided exactly in half to get the average for that state, you usually end up with the state capital. 

South Carolina.  

Greenville + Spartanburg/Orangeburg = Columbia. 

One more to underscore my genius. This one is very challenging.

Georgia

Savannah/Augusta/Macon + Atlanta =Atlanta

Usually, I just look at the map of a state, put my finger in the middle, and the biggest city nearby is usually the capital.  Oddly shaped states make this tougher, but it works pretty well.

States.JPG.1debc2f62f6c510d6a9114a893f1ffa3.JPG

Tom

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

I appreciate your opinion, but you'd be wrong. My formula always works. Georgia is somewhat skewed because her worst is also her capital but it wasn't always that way. 

...@jsharr will doubtless weigh in on Austin at some point.:popcorn:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, jsharr said:

Here is all you need to know about state capitals.  Like the rest of Texas, Austin kicks ass and takes names

https://wallethub.com/edu/best-state-capitals/19030

 

I like this list that puts Honolulu at the top! Hard to argue against it:

sort2.thumb.JPG.7deeaf5466ead7365203d0de0c649f89.JPG

Tom

  • Whatever 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, Razors Edge said:

I like this list that puts Honolulu at the top! Hard to argue against it:

sort2.thumb.JPG.7deeaf5466ead7365203d0de0c649f89.JPG

Tom

That list is sorted by quality of life.  Look at the other variables.  Austin is in the top 5 in 3 and top ten  in all 4.  Nice try though.  Next.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

55 minutes ago, Razors Edge said:

Usually, I just look at the map of a state, put my finger in the middle, and the biggest city nearby is usually the capital.  Oddly shaped states make this tougher, but it works pretty well.

States.JPG.1debc2f62f6c510d6a9114a893f1ffa3.JPG

Tom

Technically, Tallahassee was the middle - halfway between Pensacola and Jacksonville/St Augustine, and 'under the old oak tree' the site of the treaty with the Indians. While Tampa did have a port, the rest of the State didn't develop, particularly the East coast, didn't develop until the railroad era. and after the State capital was well established.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

32 minutes ago, jsharr said:

That list is sorted by quality of life.  Look at the other variables.  Austin is in the top 5 in 3 and top ten  in all 4.  Nice try though.  Next.

...I'm very happy I can afford to live some place other than Bismarck, ND.:)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

9 hours ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

If you take the very best a state has to offer, add her worst, then divided exactly in half to get the average for that state, you usually end up with the state capital. 

South Carolina.  

Greenville Hilton Head (best)+ Spartanburg/Orangeburg Greenville (worst) = Columbia. 

One more to underscore my genius. This one is very challenging.

Georgia

Savannah/Augusta/Macon Atlanta (Best) + Atlanta (worst) =Atlanta

FIFY

  • Whatever 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 hours ago, Razors Edge said:

Usually, I just look at the map of a state, put my finger in the middle, and the biggest city nearby

For Michigan, some surveyor tried to calculate the geographic center of the land mass and drove a stake in the woods that would eventually be Lansing.  I think it was better as a woodlot. 

Best city (obviously Kalamazoo) + Flint = Lansing     Works for me.

  • Heart 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My theory holds up despite your slings and arrows. The problem is some of you aren't objective. 2Far obviously comes to mind in that Atlanta is a cesspool. 

But he unwittingly brings up a calculating issue. When you personally have over 50 years of memories from an area, that area means something totally different for you. Atlanta pre-1960 was wonderful, I'm sure. 

North Carolina will demonstrate this issue for me.  (Pre-1980)

Charlotte +Asheville = Raleigh.   Very easy and scientific. The issue is Charlotte herself is slowly morphing into a cesspool as the greatest generations give way to the lunatics that migrated in from the north. Virginia has this same issue. 

Thankfully the Charlotte area is still surrounded by the Salisburys and Concords of the world giving Charlotte an air of respectability. The Cheese calculator holds but at best for only another 20 years or so. Here's a protected look at North Carolina circa 2030-2040. 

Best?  This is tough. Durham is a cesspool now, Raleigh is falling, Charlotte is leaning and on a poor foundation. 

Salisbury + Asheville(constant)/Greensboro/Charlotte = Raleigh

It is somewhat possible thanks to the close proximity and greatness of Greenville that Asheville could be transformed and return to her glory days of 1880-1919 making her the jewel of NC. Then the calculation would look like this. 

Asheville + Charlotte = Raleigh. 

It would take a great man like George Vanderbilt to pull off this miracle but because of the availability of land and the ignorance of hippies, it's possible. 

I cannot envision anything that could save or turn around Atlanta. She's gone. I have long advocated for the rerouting of north I85 at the Ga/Sc line. 

 

  • Heart 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

Asheville + Charlotte = Raleigh. 

There should only be one Carolina.  Our nation and the world would be a better place if there was only one.  2 Dakotas - fine. 2 Virginias - fine.  2 Carolinas - one too many.

 

We should start a petition.

  • Whatever 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 hours ago, jsharr said:

Here is all you need to know about state capitals.  Like the rest of Texas, Austin kicks ass and takes names

https://wallethub.com/edu/best-state-capitals/19030

 

Actually, not even close. Austin is a cesspool and doesn't remotely represent the greatness of Texas. Dallas is the jewel. 

Thankfully the greatness of Dallas and of Texans as a whole make up for El Paso, Austin, and Houston. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

Actually, not even close. Austin is a cesspool and doesn't remotely represent the greatness of Texas. Dallas is the jewel. 

Thankfully the greatness of Dallas and of Texans as a whole make up for El Paso, Austin, and Houston. 

Did you miss LIKE THE REST OF TEXAS?  All of Texas kicks ass, some parts, like Dallas, more than others.  To call Austin a cesspool just shows that you sir, are true to your carpetbagger roots.  Good Day. 

  • Heart 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, jsharr said:

Did you miss LIKE THE REST OF TEXAS?  All of Texas kicks ass, some parts, like Dallas, more than others.  To call Austin a cesspool just shows that you sir, are true to your carpetbagger roots.  Good Day. 

In your idiocy, you unwittingly bring up a good point. There is no valid reason Austin must continue to turn toward insanity, but sadly she will. 

1. Close the University of Texas at Austin

2. Fire that imbecile Popovitch and willingly give up the NBA ( Charlotte's downfall ) 

3. Burn, run out of town, whatever all the hippie transplants. Austin much like Asheville is worth saving or you'll end up with a Texas Detroit.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, AirwickWithCheese said:

In your idiocy, you unwittingly bring up a good point. There is no valid reason Austin must continue to turn toward insanity, but sadly she will. 

1. Close the University of Texas at Austin

2. Fire that imbecile Popovitch and willingly give up the NBA ( Charlotte's downfall ) 

3. Burn, run out of town, whatever all the hippie transplants. Austin much like Asheville is worth saving or you'll end up with a Texas Detroit.  

1. No, the Aggies need a scapegoat

2. I am ok with this.  Please make it happen and take Cuban with you.

3.  We already have a Detroit.  We call it Houston.

  • Awesome 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

In your idiocy, you unwittingly bring up a good point. There is no valid reason Austin must continue to turn toward insanity, but sadly she will. 

1. Close the University of Texas at Austin

2. Fire that imbecile Popovitch and willingly give up the NBA ( Charlotte's downfall ) 

3. Burn, run out of town, whatever all the hippie transplants. Austin much like Asheville is worth saving or you'll end up with a Texas Detroit.  

Because places like Mississippi should be the aim of all states.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

11 minutes ago, Wilbur said:

I hate Texas. 

You really shouldn't feel this way. If Texas falls, we all fall.    :(   

Texas needs to consolidate. Give El Paso to New Mexico, or Mexico if they can raise 100,000 and I'm not sure what you do with Houston?  Maybe cut off all roads like will eventually happen around Atlanta.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, dotman17 said:

Yeah, that's my thinking.  But it's the best I could come up with.  On the surface, those seem like lofty goals but I may be short sighted.

vision problems and even blindness come quickly with inbreeding.  Or so I have heard

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

You really shouldn't feel this way. If Texas falls, we all fall.    :(   

Texas needs to consolidate. Give El Paso to New Mexico, or Mexico if they can raise 100,000 and I'm not sure what you do with Houston?  Maybe cut off all roads like will eventually happen around Atlanta.  

I've been reading lately of cession talk from some Texas folks I know.  Sorta like California.  Wouldn't it be cool if we could lose both the egos and the hippies in one broad stroke?  This country would be broke -- but hey -- we deal with those issues when we get there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, AirwickWithCheese said:

Jsharr, get back on topic. Apply my theory to Oklahoma. Show your work please.  

Texas should slowly expand.  Absorb New Mexico, Oklahoma and Louisiana.  Get those yokels in lock step with Texican morality and then keep spreading.  Manifest Destiny.  We should take Davey Crocketts famous "You may go to Hell and I will go to Texas" and change it to "You may go to Hell, Texas is coming for you."

  • Awesome 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, jsharr said:

Texas should slowly expand.  Absorb New Mexico, Oklahoma and Louisiana.  Get those yokels in lock step with Texican morality and then keep spreading.  Manifest Destiny.  We should take Davey Crocketts famous "You may go to Hell and I will go to Texas" and change it to "You may go to Hell, Texas is coming for you."

You joke, but you'd better fight for Austin or your grandkids will be living in another California cesspool. 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...