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Road Runner

Whatever happened to Lindsay Lohan?

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1 hour ago, Road Runner said:

She used to be full of fun.  :)

I don't know if I would go that far, but, apparently, The Canyons is a good place to admire her acting ability (although Parent Trap was her best real acting work).

The Canyons (2013)

Rating: 1/2 (out of 4) 

Paul Schrader's latest deals with the rich Christian (James Deen) who's living in Los Angeles and seems to have it all until he learns that his girlfriend/sex partner (Lindsay Lohan) is having an affair with a man (Nolan Gerard Funk) who he hired in his latest movie. THE CANYONS is without question the greatest WTF movie in the history of cinema or at least to date. I say this because there was never a single second during this film where I understood what was going on or what director Schrader or screenwriter Bret Easton Ellis were trying to say or do. This film is without question a complete and utter mess and for the life of me I can't understand what the point of it was unless the only goal was to make it as cheap as they could and hope that the Lohan nude scenes would gain enough interest to make some money. Both Schrader and Ellis are so incredibly talented that it would be easy to make fun of this picture but I personally found it rather sad as neither man has found themselves involved with something this bad before and worse of all is the fact that the film makes no sense. It's meant to be some sort of twisted erotic thriller but there isn't a single thrill and the sex scenes aren't nearly as shocking as it appears the filmmakers think they are. Had this been made twenty-years ago then it might have been considered shocking but in today's day and age everything just comes across as pretty lame. Deen is fair in his first non-porn role but he certainly doesn't show enough here to warrant any future movies. The supporting players are all either bland or downright horrid and often times it seems like we're watching line rehearsals instead of an actual take. As for Lohan, well, sadly she once again is pretty bad. She just doesn't have any emotional depth here and even during her nude scenes she just looks incredibly uncomfortable and especially during a shower sequence. I'm sure this nudity is what's going to make most people check this thing out but it's really not worth it. The film also features a bad music score, some forgettable cinematography and worse of all is how deadly boring it is from start to finish. The dialogue is downright laughable and the overall feel is something cheaper and worse than what you'd expect to see on Cinemax at three in the morning. I guess the best thing I can say is that it's actually the best of the three movies Lohan has released in 2013

Tom

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1 minute ago, Road Runner said:

"Full of fun" was a reference to certain parts of her body.  Mean't to be humorous.  :)

She was bags and bags of fun.  

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Just now, Road Runner said:

You are a 🐷 !!!

I was referring to her eyes.  :)

I was referring to her baggage, she used to have lots of it.  

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4 minutes ago, jsharr said:

When did she turn into Nicole Kiddman?

I'm thinking it was when she took her makeup off.

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She was on an episode of Anger Management with Charlie Sheen a few years ago. That's the last I saw of her.

Here's one of the last hurrahs of two of Hollywood's biggest train wrecks:

 

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Just now, AirwickWithCheese said:

I really thought  @RalphWaldoMooseworth would especially be the one to appreciate my excellent memory but I can't buy a like from him these days.     :(

Me neither.  He used to like my posts all the time, but now he ignores mine and gives likes to far less worthy ones.  I think he is mad at you and since I am your lackey, he is giving me the cold shoulder as well.  :(   

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16 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

But what did I do?   :dontknow:

Must have been pretty bad to piss Ralph off.  He's the nicest guy on the forum.  

So now, you have @KirbyAND @RalphWaldoMooseworthmad at you.  Just try not to screw things up with @PedalJoy.  :)

 

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4 hours ago, AirwickWithCheese said:

I really thought  @RalphWaldoMooseworth would especially be the one to appreciate my excellent memory but I can't buy a like from him these days.     :(

I'll pass judgement (and maybe a little gas) later when I have time to read it. :D

 

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