AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Share #1 Posted March 5, 2019 I doubt she would attend but you never know. I wish to make this official. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Airehead Posted March 5, 2019 Popular Post Share #2 Posted March 5, 2019 Best way to do that is let her pass first. 5 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Author Share #3 Posted March 5, 2019 3 minutes ago, Airehead said: Best way to do that is let her pass first. I don't know. I wish her well but I do not want reconciliation on any level. There's a chance she would attend with MomCheese and so I must legally prohibit the chance while I still can. You may attend Aire although I know you will be too busy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kzoo Posted March 5, 2019 Share #4 Posted March 5, 2019 I heard that she was going to lead the procession to the cemetery in the Mustang - with MomCheese smoking her Marlboros in the passenger seat. You lying peacefully in the hearse behind and her in the Mustang with a smile on her face. That's what I heard... You should attempt reconciliation. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Square Wheels Posted March 5, 2019 Share #5 Posted March 5, 2019 She will do a drive by in your her Mustang with Wilbur riding shotgun and humming Lynyrd Skynyrd songs. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Airehead Posted March 5, 2019 Share #6 Posted March 5, 2019 2 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said: I don't know. I wish her well but I do not want reconciliation on any level. There's a chance she would attend with MomCheese and so I must legally prohibit the chance while I still can. You may attend Aire although I know you will be too busy. I will attend but you will surely outlive me. Put in your will that she gets nothing from your estate and may not attend. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Author Share #7 Posted March 5, 2019 1 minute ago, Airehead said: I will attend but you will surely outlive me. Put in your will that she gets nothing from your estate and may not attend. I just want a good home for Sam. I think he should go live with Ylva and Couch. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilbur ★ Posted March 5, 2019 Share #8 Posted March 5, 2019 4 minutes ago, Square Wheels said: She will do a drive by in your her Mustang with Wilbur riding shotgun and humming Lynyrd Skynyrd songs. Is she bangable? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted March 5, 2019 Share #9 Posted March 5, 2019 Simple solution, have your service early so you can monitor the door yourself. Will there be RC Cola and a sandwich tray? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Author Share #10 Posted March 5, 2019 2 minutes ago, Wilbur said: Is she bangable? You are mean, Wilbur, and will miss me. You may attend, although again I know you can't be bothered, please have WOWilbur wear a modest black dress with beautiful pearls. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilbur ★ Posted March 5, 2019 Share #11 Posted March 5, 2019 Just now, AirwickWithCheese said: You are mean, Wilbur, and will miss me. You may attend, although again I know you can't be bothered, please have WOWilbur wear a modest black dress with beautiful pearls. I was asking for Neil. He will do almost anybody but I really want him there to perform "Old Man". 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted March 5, 2019 Share #12 Posted March 5, 2019 11 minutes ago, Kzoo said: I heard that she was going to lead the procession to the cemetery in the Mustang - with MomCheese smoking her Marlboros in the passenger seat. You lying peacefully in the hearse behind and her in the Mustang with a smile on her face. That's what I heard... You should attempt reconciliation. Who knew that they made hearse trailers? 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Square Wheels Posted March 5, 2019 Share #13 Posted March 5, 2019 6 minutes ago, Wilbur said: Is she bangable? I wasn't complainin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted March 5, 2019 Share #14 Posted March 5, 2019 16 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said: I don't know. I wish her well but I do not want reconciliation on any level. ...I recall similar squabbles among my Bubbie's siblings. As little kid, I needed a scorecard to follow who was and was not speaking to whom. Now that I think about it, that might be how I ended up in California, 3,000 miles away from most of the insanity. But there was one sister (who was meaner than Satan's snake), here, in San Francisco. Still it cut down on the confusion by reducing the numbers. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Author Share #15 Posted March 5, 2019 Just now, Page Turner said: ...I recall similar squabbles among my Bubbie's siblings. As little kid, I needed a scorecard to follow who was and was not speaking to whom. I know you won't attend Page. You never gave me a bicycle. When your opportunity is lost, I hope it makes you sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted March 5, 2019 Share #16 Posted March 5, 2019 3 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said: I know you won't attend Page. You never gave me a bicycle. ...I thought all my bikes were the wrong size for you ? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted March 5, 2019 Share #17 Posted March 5, 2019 3 minutes ago, Page Turner said: ...I thought all my bikes were the wrong size for you ? You could send me Cheese’s bike. I will put a basket and streamers on it. I would use the basket primarily to transport picnic items. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted March 5, 2019 Share #18 Posted March 5, 2019 17 minutes ago, Wilbur said: Is she bangable? Are you pickier than @Parr8hed? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Author Share #19 Posted March 5, 2019 I will rest very close to the school that was named for Wade Hampton III. I picked the oldest section, a spot that has been mostly forgotten. I hope a Carolina wren family lives close by and will sing to me all day. I do not wish to have visitors or have any non-Greenvillians resting nearby. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted March 5, 2019 Share #20 Posted March 5, 2019 6 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said: I will rest very close to the school that was named for Wade Hampton III. I picked the oldest section, a spot that has been mostly forgotten. I hope a Carolina wren family lives close by and will sing to me all day. I do not wish to have visitors or have any non-Greenvillians resting nearby. I think there should be really good food at a service. The cold cut tray was a thing for the funerals I went to as a child. Also present often was the jello/cool whip salad. I don’t think this is appropriate these days There should be several flavors of zima, and the dishes should be spectacular enough to tempt the deceased to reanimate. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Author Share #21 Posted March 5, 2019 I wish it to rain the day of my service. Cold hard rain with a dark grey sky. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted March 5, 2019 Share #22 Posted March 5, 2019 People should bring their pets to services. If they don’t have any, at least one should be purchased for the event. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Author Share #23 Posted March 5, 2019 Just now, Randomguy said: People should bring their pets to services. If they don’t have any, at least one should be purchased for the event. I'm not laughing at your ridiculousness anymore. You didn't tell me you had a brother. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilbur ★ Posted March 5, 2019 Share #24 Posted March 5, 2019 7 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said: I'm not laughing at your ridiculousness anymore. You didn't tell me you had a brother. I knew! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Author Share #25 Posted March 5, 2019 1 minute ago, Wilbur said: I knew! Screw both of you. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted March 5, 2019 Share #26 Posted March 5, 2019 21 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said: I wish it to rain the day of my service. Cold hard rain with a dark grey sky. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 5, 2019 Author Share #27 Posted March 5, 2019 Just now, Page Turner said: Those ladies have beautiful legs. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted March 5, 2019 Share #28 Posted March 5, 2019 36 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said: I will rest very close to the school that was named for Wade Hampton III. I picked the oldest section, a spot that has been mostly forgotten. I hope a Carolina wren family lives close by and will sing to me all day. I do not wish to have visitors or have any non-Greenvillians resting nearby. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted March 5, 2019 Share #29 Posted March 5, 2019 43 minutes ago, Randomguy said: You could send me Cheese’s bike. I will put a basket and streamers on it. I would use the basket primarily to transport picnic items. ...I have no bicycles suitable for streamers and a basket. I can get you one cheap over at the bike co-op here, though. They have a red Dunelt 3 Speed that is identical to the one I had as a kid. It's a 21" frame. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kzoo Posted March 6, 2019 Share #30 Posted March 6, 2019 Dibs on your stuff. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted March 6, 2019 Share #31 Posted March 6, 2019 41 minutes ago, AirwickWithCheese said: I'm not laughing at your ridiculousness anymore. You didn't tell me you had a brother. Animals may also be borrowed or stolen for the event. Ladies may not wear frivolous hats. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilbur ★ Posted March 6, 2019 Share #32 Posted March 6, 2019 Can I be willed your casement windows, please? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdc2000 Posted March 6, 2019 Share #33 Posted March 6, 2019 https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-40718253 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirby Posted March 6, 2019 Share #34 Posted March 6, 2019 I am sorry she's behaved in a way that makes you feel this. She's missing out on a good brother. I will be spending eternity next to my wild sister (on my left) and some stranger on my right. My parents bought us all plots at a small country cemetery in the Catskills. There is a good field nearby for picnics. After you visit my grave, you should go to Ted's for a hot turkey sandwich. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted March 6, 2019 Share #35 Posted March 6, 2019 ...what should we order at Ted's if we go to visit your wild sister ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirby Posted March 6, 2019 Share #36 Posted March 6, 2019 14 hours ago, Page Turner said: ...what should we order at Ted's if we go to visit your wild sister ? Basket of fried chicken, usually, or a gyro. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MickinMD ★ Posted March 6, 2019 Share #37 Posted March 6, 2019 The only conversation I've had about my demise with the sister - 9 years younger than me and probably still around when I pass away - is that if there's no hope of a non-painful, non-high-stess existence if something awful happens, pull the plug. I'd rather my nephews blow their inheritance and stimulate the economy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kzoo Posted March 6, 2019 Share #38 Posted March 6, 2019 Just now, MickinMD said: The only conversation I've had about my demise with the sister - 9 years younger than me and probably still around when I pass away - is that if there's no hope of a non-painful, non-high-stess existence if something awful happens, pull the plug. I'd rather my nephews blow their inheritance and stimulate the economy. That will only happen if you have a living will. Your sister can't make that determination for you at the time unless you have done something to make that happen. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted March 6, 2019 Share #39 Posted March 6, 2019 ...I am an only child, so if anyone shows up at the service claiming to be my sister it's probably @AirwickWithCheese, dressed in drag, trying for a bicycle. 1 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 6, 2019 Author Share #40 Posted March 6, 2019 2 hours ago, Kirby said: Basket of fried chicken, usually, or a gyro. You are taking my demise quite lightly Miss Kirby. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tizeye Posted March 6, 2019 Share #41 Posted March 6, 2019 21 hours ago, AirwickWithCheese said: I will rest very close to the school that was named for Wade Hampton III. I picked the oldest section, a spot that has been mostly forgotten. I hope a Carolina wren family lives close by and will sing to me all day. I do not wish to have visitors or have any non-Greenvillians resting nearby. It is the plot right next to your sister. At least that is what she was saying. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kzoo Posted March 6, 2019 Share #42 Posted March 6, 2019 3 minutes ago, Tizeye said: It is the plot right next to your sister. At least that is what she was saying. It's MomCheese then SisCheese and then Cheese. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirby Posted March 6, 2019 Share #43 Posted March 6, 2019 1 hour ago, AirwickWithCheese said: You are taking my demise quite lightly Miss Kirby. Not in the least. I am very sad that you have to make these sorts of contingency plans. But I am also sharing some background from my own family history. When we buried my Dad, the family all went to Ted's afterwards for Hot Turkey Sandwiches (although a few of the cousins had the hot roast beef sandwiches). This longstanding tradition brought some comfort and nice memories of childhood to a very sad day. I hope everyone has a similar chance to recall happy memories of the past during times of loss. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Square Wheels Posted March 6, 2019 Share #44 Posted March 6, 2019 You act as though your sister would notice you're gone. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted March 6, 2019 Share #45 Posted March 6, 2019 1 hour ago, AirwickWithCheese said: You are taking my demise quite lightly Miss Kirby. ...so you're not one of those people who wants your friends to gather, celebrate your as you were in life, and move on ? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted March 6, 2019 Share #46 Posted March 6, 2019 36 minutes ago, Kirby said: I hope everyone has a similar chance to recall happy memories of the past during times of loss. ...I certainly did. When I flew back to D.C. to bury my mom at Arlington (with my father), I got stuck in traffic on the Memorial Bridge immediately afterward. Boy, let me tell you that brought back some memories. 1 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MickinMD ★ Posted March 6, 2019 Share #47 Posted March 6, 2019 When I'm dead, my body will be just what the Klingons said a dead body was when humans on Captain Picard's Starship Enterprise became the first to witness the Klingons death ritual. After they all howled into the air - to warn the afterlife that a Klingon warrior was coming to join them, they dropped the body on the ground and walked away. When Captain Picard asked what they wanted done with the body, they replied something like, "Do with it as you wish. It is now nothing more than an empty shell." When I'm gone I don't care if they tan my hide and use it as a pinata. Actually I requested that a party be thrown on one of the Baltimore-Annapolis party-cruise boats and that, when no one in authority is looking, my relatives pour my cremated ashes into the Chesapeake Bay to provide nutrients for the future crabs, rockfish, etc. that brought me so much pleasure in catching and eating them. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post groupw Posted March 6, 2019 Popular Post Share #48 Posted March 6, 2019 My dad's funeral was yesterday. He was cremated after. We will take his ashes to the Black Hills and spread them on the land where his Grandma's homestead was. The pastor laughed at the stories we shared. After deciding what we thought was OK for church, it looked like a redacted CIA document. The pastor edited further, before sharing with the guests. Lunch was sandwiches from the church ladies. Last night we went to a local brewery for dinner then back to our house and told more stories about dad. When I have a little more energy, I will share a few.. 5 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 6, 2019 Author Share #49 Posted March 6, 2019 @groupw that was beautiful. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AirwickWithCheese Posted March 6, 2019 Author Share #50 Posted March 6, 2019 I would ask that Chick Fil A cater my affair. This way I can be certain that only the beautiful people attend. I will offer one exemption for RG as long as he is prohibited from speaking. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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