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When do you say No?


jsharr

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I was asked today if I would consider being the next Scout Master for my younger son's troop.  This is a three year commitment and it is a LOT of work, but would be very rewarding and I would be Ryan's Scout Master if and when he becomes an Eagle Scout.  

To me, this is a great honor to be asked and I realize how important the job is.    I work for a "start up" in a way, as we are still just a few years old and we are at the point of going really big or not going.  The next 6 months will be crucial.  

I do not know what to say.  I am honored but really cannot say yes, not knowing what the next year will bring, and if I say no, then I may not be asked again and my sons will both be done as Scouts.
 

Can one of you flip a coin for me and let me know what to do?

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2 minutes ago, Airehead said:

Say no if you cannot give it your all. Explain why and offer to help as you are able. Then have no guilt. 

Good advice, but how do I deal with the regret?  I have already explained to Ryan that I was asked, and told him that if me being his Scout Master would bother him, I will say no for sure.

But I want to do this, but want to and can are so different and right now, I am not sure I can.

This sucks.  

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1 minute ago, Scrapr said:

tough spot. You would be a great SM. How is the talent pool? Could you be an ASM?

The talent pool is deep, which is my my being asked is such an honor.  So many Eagle Scout parents and fully committed parents in this troop.   One of the best Troops in the Dallas area.   To be their Scout Master would be a huge honor.    Really conflicted and do not want my pride to make the wrong decision.  

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11 minutes ago, Scrapr said:

tough spot. You would be a great SM. How is the talent pool? Could you be an ASS?

 

7 minutes ago, jsharr said:

And thank you for your kind words and advice.  ASS was a thought as well.  

You seem perfectly suited to be an ASS.  Go for it.  :nodhead:

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...if the talent pol is that deep, and your commitments at work are open ended, it seems like an easy decision.  I'm not sure how well the father as Scoutmaster thing works out anyway.  I've seen one ASST Scoutmaster dad and son combo that was not all that healthy (IMO).  

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1 hour ago, jsharr said:

I was asked today if I would consider being the next Scout Master for my younger son's troop.  This is a three year commitment and it is a LOT of work, but would be very rewarding and I would be Ryan's Scout Master if and when he becomes an Eagle Scout.  

To me, this is a great honor to be asked and I realize how important the job is.    I work for a "start up" in a way, as we are still just a few years old and we are at the point of going really big or not going.  The next 6 months will be crucial.  

I do not know what to say.  I am honored but really cannot say yes, not knowing what the next year will bring, and if I say no, then I may not be asked again and my sons will both be done as Scouts.
 

Can one of you flip a coin for me and let me know what to do?

I think you have shown a great commitment to your boys... fantastic role model... but I think you owe it to yourself to see what can happen in the next 6 months. There will be other gigs you can show your support and involvement with. And who knows?? There might be something better lurking around the corner. I have no doubt you will make it up to Ryan in other ways. My vote is to put yourself first... knowing if you hit it, you were sacrificing for them (him) anyway.

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1 hour ago, jsharr said:

Good advice, but how do I deal with the regret?  I have already explained to Ryan that I was asked, and told him that if me being his Scout Master would bother him, I will say no for sure.

But I want to do this, but want to and can are so different and right now, I am not sure I can.

This sucks.  

You know what would really suck, being SM and unemployed because your paying job suffered.

I did two 4 year stunts as booster President. I had a flexible and stable job but being a booster did make my job more difficult.

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2 hours ago, Airehead said:

Say no if you cannot give it your all. Explain why and offer to help as you are able. Then have no guilt. 

Aire is wise.  You wouldn't want to make the commitment and not be able to do it well.

I'm not sure I understand this sentence:

Quote

if I say no, then I may not be asked again and my sons will both be done as Scouts.

Would your saying no to being Scout Master impact your kids participation?  Or do you just mean that your kids will be done soon and you may not get another chance?

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27 minutes ago, Kirby said:

Aire is wise.  You wouldn't want to make the commitment and not be able to do it well.

I'm not sure I understand this sentence:

Would your saying no to being Scout Master impact your kids participation?  Or do you just mean that your kids will be done soon and you may not get another chance?

It looked funny to me as I first read it, too.  In a different light, I think it means the next possible onboarding cycle is 3 years away and by then his kids are done, so his window is now.

I concur, I think pass on the 3-year commitment thing if you can't predict what is about to throw your life into  massive upheaval.

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A guy at work is a SM, he is on light duty at work and manages to find plenty of free time to work on scout stuff. I am surprised at how much time he devotes to scout stuff. He carries a pretty big backpack full of paperwork and spends a good part of the day on his phone with the paper spread all over the locker room bench he has claimed as his office.

If he was on a normal duty job I don't think he would get away with so much gov't. work. 

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