Tell us about the time you almost died....

[Randomguy]

[BuffJim]

Nov 30 2012. Pulmonary embolism. If it was a millimeter or two bigger, it probably would have killed me.  
 

Dec 7, 2019. Driving home, a semi was coming in my direction. But he stayed in his lane, and I stayed in mine, thus avoiding a fatal collision. 

[Allen ★]

Foggy night. I was at a complete stop waiting for the car in front of me to turn left. The osmobuick behind me never looked up. I ended up on top of the car in front of me with a broken neck. 

[jsharr ★]

Drank lighter fluid as a toddler .   Luckily my brother told my mom.   Spent some time in hospital in an oxygen tent.

[Road Runner]

I've told this story before here, but here it is again.  I was driving on an all-night trip from Virginia to Alabama back in 1982.  I have a bad habit of falling asleep at the wheel.  Sometime during the wee hours of the night on I-85, I dozed off.  Hitting rumble strips or maybe just debris on the edge of the road jarred me awake.  I was staring dead ahead at a concrete rail or whatever it is called that ran along the edge of the bridge, approaching it at 65 mph.  Within what seemed like just a few yards away, I was able to turn the wheel of my van and swerve to just barely miss plowing into the end of the rail.  If I had slept for just a half second more, I would have surely slammed into the concrete rail and died that night.  

[maddmaxx ★]

It started with me in possession of the wrong end of the knife.  I cut my own finger mostly off reversing that situation.

[groupw]

Appendix rupture. Full abscess. They had to do the big incision. I was in the hospital for a week while they waited for my bowels to start functioning correctly. I was called the "Walking Miracle". 

[Ralphie ★]

I've told this here before a few times also, but at least it is a cycling topic! 

When I was a teenager I replaced my bike's brake pads, then I rode down the hill by my house.  Since I was a dumbass kid, I didn;t test them first, nor did I change my habit of screeching to a halt at stop signs,  So when I jammed on the brakes, nothing happened and I went shoosting across the busy US highway and it took the whole long downhill block to manage to get stopped.  I examined the brakes and no pads in the holders!  An even dumber ass than me had designed them to retain in only one direction - there were no tabs on the direction of rotation so they went shooting out of the holders when I braked!  So I like to remember that story as a reminder of how lucky I am to be here. :)  That road is very heavily trafficked with many trucks.  It was a miracle I lived through it!

[Randomguy]

1 hour ago, BuffJim said:

Dec 7, 2019. Driving home, a semi was coming in my direction. But he stayed in his lane, and I stayed in mine, thus avoiding a fatal collision. 

Whew!

[Randomguy]

55 minutes ago, Road Runner said:

I've told this story before here, but here it is again.  I was driving on an all-night trip from Virginia to Alabama back in 1982.  I have a bad habit of falling asleep at the wheel.  Sometime during the wee hours of the night on I-85, I dozed off.  Hitting rumble strips or maybe just debris on the edge of the road jarred me awake.  I was staring dead ahead at a concrete rail or whatever it is called that ran along the edge of the bridge, approaching it at 65 mph.  Within what seemed like just a few yards away, I was able to turn the wheel of my van and swerve to just barely miss plowing into the end of the rail.  If I had slept for just a half second more, I would have surely slammed into the concrete rail and died that night.  

I 'whatevered' you because Cheese wasn't here to do it.  I appreciated it, though, that is pretty lucky!

[Longjohn ★]

Which time? I can’t list them all.

[Ralphie ★]

Just now, Longjohn said:

Which time? I can’t list them all.

I just have a few more. 

[2Far ★]

There have been a few. 
 

a guy driving the wrong way on the interstate in the left lane, I was on a motorcycle ? n the right lane.

a guy driving the wrong way on the interstate in the left lane, I was in the left lane. Totaled both vehicles. 

I was sitting on the left stool:

 

[Road Runner]

When I do have an accident or something bad happens, I always think about the circumstances and how if I hadn't been in a specific place at that specific time, nothing would have happened to me.  I think, "If some little thing had happened differently and slightly delayed me when I left the house, that terrible thing would never have happened and I would never know how lucky I was." 

I often wonder how many times in our lives we are just moments away from a terrible fate, but because of some little happenstance (such as something that occurred on our way out the door that cost us a extra few seconds), we are saved.  We were within a hair of dying and we never knew it.   

[BR46]

Long story short. I didn't feel good, Wo46 took me to the hospital, they rushed me to surgery to remove  my gallbladder,  went into septic shock, stopped breathing, woke up in Intensive care. 

The other time I almost died was when I suggested Wo46 get a stationary bike.

[Square Wheels]

Self imposed, sad stories, may not repeat them again.

[ChrisL]

Was patrolling the back perimeter of an airfield of them rural VA and some hunters were poaching on the base. They started taking pot shots at our patrol vehicle, I think they were trying to hit the light bar. One bullet went through the roof and blew out the door window missing my head by inches.  

Nearly drowned once surfing as a kid.   I don’t know how I survived being held under getting pummeled to the point I almost blacked out.  By some miracle I popped up, took a deep breath before the next wave took me under.

[Randomguy]

15 minutes ago, 2Far said:

There have been a few. 
 

a guy driving the wrong way on the interstate in the left lane, I was on a motorcycle ? n the right lane.

a guy driving the wrong way on the interstate in the left lane, I was in the left lane. Totaled both vehicles. 

I was sitting on the left stool:

 

What were you reading?

[Rumble_Strip ★]

6 minutes ago, Randomguy said:

What were you reading?

 

[Chris...]

Bacterial meningitis in the early 90’s. Spent 10 days in the hospital

[Naomi]

Tear in aorta when hit by a car while cycling.  I got to use 17 bags of blood for that one. 

[Ralphie ★]

37 minutes ago, ChrisL said:

Was patrolling the back perimeter of an airfield of them rural VA and some hunters were poaching on the base. They started taking pot shots at our patrol vehicle, I think they were trying to hit the light bar. One bullet went through the roof and blew out the door window missing my head by inches.  

Did you catch the bastards?

[Ralphie ★]

28 minutes ago, Rumble_Strip said:

 

POTW, at least. :D

 

[Randomguy]

4 minutes ago, Wilbur said:

 I got to use 17 bags of blood for that one. 

Did you recycle the bags?

[Naomi]

16 minutes ago, Randomguy said:

Did you recycle the bags?

I take red meat to work in them.    

[ChrisL]

4 minutes ago, RalphWaldoMooseworth said:

Did you catch the bastards?

I probably shared this before but it was at night, my partner was a FNG and when the first shot hit us he stopped & froze.  I was yelling at him to get the fuck out of here but he just stared at me with the WTF is happening deer in the headlight look.  A round blew out our rear side window and then the round just missed my head so I said fuck this & bailed out.  Just as I bailed out dipshit took off & left me!  

No radio, just a .45 and I was gonna kill those fuckers so stalked them about 1/4 mile (they were probably 100 yards out). I heard them say did one get out!?!!  So I followed them by sound only as they were dragging their ladder back towards the fence line. 

They got back over the fence & took off before I could get them.  About 20 minutes later the cavalry came for me.  

The aftermath of what happened to FNG is another story in of itself... 

[Randomguy]

6 minutes ago, ChrisL said:

I probably shared this before but it was at night, my partner was a FNG and when the first shot hit us he stopped & froze.  I was yelling at him to get the fuck out of here but he just stared at me with the WTF is happening deer in the headlight look.  A round blew out our rear side window and then the round just missed my head so I said fuck this & bailed out.  Just as I bailed out dipshit took off & left me!  

No radio, just a .45 and I was gonna kill those fuckers so stalked them about 1/4 mile (they were probably 100 yards out). I heard them say did one get out!?!!  So I followed them by sound only as they were dragging their ladder back towards the fence line. 

They got back over the fence & took off before I could get them.  About 20 minutes later the cavalry came for me.  

The aftermath of what happened to FNG is another story in of itself... 

FNG?

[ChrisL]

6 minutes ago, Randomguy said:

FNG?

Fucking New Guy.  Good privates that just need to learn the ropes are Newbs or cherries. Dipshit privates  are FNG’s.  He was sent to me to try to get him up to speed but he was just too much of a dipshit. 

[MickinMD ★]

Mid-December, 1961.  A couple feet of snow were on the ground, the streets semi-plowed and the nice old lady next store, who all of us kids on the block affectionately called "Grandma Westgate," phoned 11 year-old me and asked if I'd come to her house, get money, and go to the corner store for her to get bread and milk.

I got the money and as I began to walk to the store, my friend Dennis and his mother, Miss Anne, were waiting for the local bus across the street.  Miss Anne called out, "Mickey, are you going to the store for Grandma Westgate?  Would you come here and take this bag of Christmas cards and drop them in the mailbox on the corner for me?"

As I got the bag, the bus came, Miss Anne and Dennis got on, and I began to walk in front of the bus to get to the other, more cleared, side of the street.  That's all I remember of the event. The rest I was told.  A pickup truck decided to pass the stopped bus as I was almost past the front of the bus.  To warn me, the bus driver beeped his horn but, instead of being warned, it scared me into rushing past the front of the bus - right into the path of the truck.

Three days later, I woke up in a hospital, my mother staring down at me, and my first words were, "Where am I?"  I've never remembered anything about the incident after taking the bag of Christmas cards from Miss Anne.  I had broken my right collar bone and had a severe concussion.  I spent Christmas in the hospital and then, with both my parents working, Miss Anne watched me at her house, during the day, including after after I returned to school in a few weeks and until I was healed.  She was a fantastic Polish-American cook and her husband had a great income, so I didn't mind it much as I was treated to fresh, expertly made Pierogies (not found in stores then!), Golubkis (Polish stuffed cabbage: "Pigs in the Blanket"), Duck's Blood Soup, Chrusciki (Polish Bow Tie cookies), etc.

[2Far ★]

4 hours ago, Randomguy said:

What were you reading?

One of Gladwell’s books, might have been Outliers.

[Further]

Never even came close...

[Ralphie ★]

6 minutes ago, Further said:

Never even came close...

Why do I not believe that?!

[BR46]

2 hours ago, Further said:

Never even came close...

You want to go for a ride on my sidecar? 

[Scrapr ★]

One of my innumerable colonscopies. Had full on anesthesia because they are looking for inflamation from my Crohns. I aspirated some stomach fluid into my lungs. Was coughing pretty hard in recovery including some yellow fluid on the pillow. They released me anyway. I get home & start shivering and can't get warm. Call advice murse. Go to Urgent care. Tried to stand up to get a chest x ray. Could not hold my breath. Could barely stand up. They took me out on an ambulance. At the ER the doc asks me if I have an advance directive....whoah. That sobered me up. Pneumonia. 3 days in a room with antibiotics pumping 24 hours a day. All free. I complaining to the GI doc about having to pay for that F up. She was head of the department. She got it waived & also a phone call of apology from anesthesiologist

Or the time I was driving truck with a set of doubles. Wide open rural 3 lane road and some oncoming drunk decides to use my way to go home. I swerved at last moment. I was sure my back trailer was going to nick him. It was a cab over so would have been bad for him but would have messed me up good as well

[Ralphie ★]

1 hour ago, Scrapr said:

One of my innumerable colonscopies. Had full on anesthesia because they are looking for inflamation from my Crohns. I aspirated some stomach fluid into my lungs. Was coughing pretty hard in recovery including some yellow fluid on the pillow. They released me anyway. I get home & start shivering and can't get warm. Call advice murse. Go to Urgent care. Tried to stand up to get a chest x ray. Could not hold my breath. Could barely stand up. They took me out on an ambulance. At the ER the doc asks me if I have an advance directive....whoah. That sobered me up. Pneumonia. 3 days in a room with antibiotics pumping 24 hours a day. All free. I complaining to the GI doc about having to pay for that F up. She was head of the department. She got it waived & also a phone call of apology from anesthesiologist

Or the time I was driving truck with a set of doubles. Wide open rural 3 lane road and some oncoming drunk decides to use my way to go home. I swerved at last moment. I was sure my back trailer was going to nick him. It was a cab over so would have been bad for him but would have messed me up good as well

I woke up from my latest colonoscopy also coughing my ass off, but thankfully an hour or so with a nebulizer got me in good enough shape to go home.  I never realized that anesthesia was so hard on the lungs,

[Airehead]

19 hours ago, ChrisL said:

I probably shared this before but it was at night, my partner was a FNG and when the first shot hit us he stopped & froze.  I was yelling at him to get the fuck out of here but he just stared at me with the WTF is happening deer in the headlight look.  A round blew out our rear side window and then the round just missed my head so I said fuck this & bailed out.  Just as I bailed out dipshit took off & left me!  

No radio, just a .45 and I was gonna kill those fuckers so stalked them about 1/4 mile (they were probably 100 yards out). I heard them say did one get out!?!!  So I followed them by sound only as they were dragging their ladder back towards the fence line. 

They got back over the fence & took off before I could get them.  About 20 minutes later the cavalry came for me.  

The aftermath of what happened to FNG is another story in of itself... 

I’d like to hear more about the FNG

[Ralphie ★]

15 minutes ago, Airehead said:

I’d like to hear more about the FNG

Gomer Pyle and ChrisL was Sergeant Carter. :D

 

[Road Runner]

34 minutes ago, RalphWaldoMooseworth said:

I woke up from my latest colonoscopy also coughing my ass off, but thankfully an hour or so with a nebulizer got me in good enough shape to go home.  I never realized that anesthesia was so hard on the lungs,

I hope the doctor you went to didn't have Penthouse magazines in his waiting room.  

[Ralphie ★]

1 minute ago, Road Runner said:

I hope the doctor you went to didn't have Penthouse magazines in his waiting room.  

Nope, did not see any!

[ChrisL]

42 minutes ago, Airehead said:

I’d like to hear more about the FNG

 

26 minutes ago, RalphWaldoMooseworth said:

Gomer Pyle and ChrisL was Sergeant Carter.

 

Yeah not quiet...

So dipshit returns to the station and tells the desk sergeant what happens. Desk Sergeant blows a freaking gasket, leaves me in the woods, doesn’t call it in & lets a good 10 minutes go by by driving back to tell him. He couldn’t even accurately tell them where I was... 

I get brought back by other units and am freaking pissed.  Dipshit tries to apologize but I wasn’t having it and beat his ass. Funny now, wasn’t then but there was like 10 guys there and they all turned and walked away, yeah I ain’t breaking that up.

Dipshit was relieved of duty as an MP and was doing every shitty detail we could think of, at one point he was cutting grass with scissors & a ruler  (don’t let me find a blade of grass longer than 1 1/4 inch long). He was then transferred out of our unit and had to change MOS (military jobs).   Our 1st Sergeant said he was transferred into food service.

[shootingstar]

Does anyone remember Ellen in the forum.....she nearly died while having surgery. She saw the white light....the near death experience.

My  dearie nearly died from infectious disease when he was a little boy in kindergarten.  Remember Germany was pulling itself out of war ashes, so public infrastructure was still tattered.  He remembers walking, crawling home and collapsing in a park. and somehow he awoke or someone got him home.  He did see the white light in dream state...  He was operated and they found ringworm in his intestines, etc. 

A good friend my age, had major surgery in her bowel area...she nearly died...according to the doctors.  She did see the white light.

[Naomi]

5 minutes ago, shootingstar said:

Does anyone remember Ellen in the forum.....she nearly died while having surgery. She saw the white light....the near death experience.

My  dearie nearly died from infectious disease when he was a little boy in kindergarten.  Remember Germany was pulling itself out of war ashes, so public infrastructure was still tattered.  He remembers walking home and collapsing in a park. and somehow he awoke or someone got him home.  He did see the white light in dream state...  He was operated and they found ringworm in his intestines, etc. 

A good friend my age, had major surgery in her bowel area...she nearly died...according to the doctors.  She did see the white light.

I did not see a white light.  

[shootingstar]

4 minutes ago, Wilbur said:

I did not see a white light.  

Every person who had the experience....it was in a dream state. But dearie's mother was told by doctor he could have died if they hadn't got him to hospital after half an hr.

[late]

When you get close to death your body produces drugs that are similar to opiates. They're why opiates work...

IOW, you're stoned out of your gourd.