Pregnant girl in high school class?

[shootingstar]

This is a strong defense by an (older) teenage mo m about stereotypes about teenage parents, etc.  She became pregnant @15 yrs.

Was/were there any pregnant female classmates in your high school grade/class at the time you were a student?

There were...a lovely quiet young woman, who suddenly appeared at our school in our class. She didn't seem to say much. Then she left our school after having her baby. We were all 18-19 yrs. old.

Another in my final high school year class (we were all 19 yrs. old. Ontario had gr. 13 before it was removed....).  She got pregnant....by a minister's son who was a popular guy, a bit rebellious.  I got to know her in a general way. We walked to school, chatting.  She was a loner amongst all of us bright, young women (older teenagers).    The young woman I knew, was very bright. I mean she was so erudite and intelliegent, that most of us , girls (who were also scoring in 90's in subjects) couldn't relate to her at all.  No, the guy and girl, never became a couple/lived together.  In fact, they seemed to avoid each other in school.

I've wondered how their lives turned out. Hopefully well.  The latter woman was taking university classes part-time.. after we all finished high school, etc.

This was back in 1977-1978.

 

 

[Longjohn ★]

I graduated back in the sixties. The sexual revolution had started but the schools didn’t handle it well. We lost about half the girls in our class because they were not allowed to go to school while pregnant. We wanted to include them in our class for class reunions but didn’t have contact information on most of them.

[shootingstar]

27 minutes ago, Longjohn said:

I graduated back in the sixties. The sexual revolution had started but the schools didn’t handle it well. We lost about half the girls in our class because they were not allowed to go to school while pregnant. We wanted to include them in our class for class reunions but didn’t have contact information on most of them.

I will say immediately even back then, as a peer, same age as the pregnant classmate....it was so other worldly to most of us, girls...that most of us didn't socialize much with each pregnant girl.  I know, awful.  But, probably we were thinking too much of ourselves..menstruating enough with some raging hormones, but not wanting to become like "her".   Yea, kids...are kids.

There was another situation where a girl  who was 1 yr. younger than I and friend of my sister.  As peers, we  were stunned to learn the girl was pregnant @18 yrs.....she was a vivacious and very academically bright.  The father was also a brilliant (art) student and all round academically strong in school.  They were a good couple in high school...well then,,,later.  He eventually went to CAnada's top art and design college, then worked in industrial design and film animation.  I believe he is working California for Pixar now.  He is my age.  So the couple never married, he certainly never helped raise the child.

They both came from upper middle class families.  

 

[MickinMD ★]

1 hour ago, shootingstar said:

This is a strong defense by an (older) teenage mo m about stereotypes about teenage parents, etc.  She became pregnant @15 yrs.

Was/were there any pregnant female classmates in your high school grade/class at the time you were a student?

There were...a lovely quiet young woman, who suddenly appeared at our school in our class. She didn't seem to say much. Then she left our school after having her baby. We were all 18-19 yrs. old.

Another in my final high school year class (we were all 19 yrs. old. Ontario had gr. 13 before it was removed....).  She got pregnant....by a minister's son who was a popular guy, a bit rebellious.  I got to know her in a general way. We walked to school, chatting.  She was a loner amongst all of us bright, young women (older teenagers).    The young woman I knew, was very bright. I mean she was so erudite and intelliegent, that most of us , girls (who were also scoring in 90's in subjects) couldn't relate to her at all.  No, the guy and girl, never became a couple/lived together.  In fact, they seemed to avoid each other in school.

I've wondered how their lives turned out. Hopefully well.  The latter woman was taking university classes part-time.. after we all finished high school, etc.

This was back in 1977-1978.

 

 

Stereotypes?  The only one I know is that despicable claim that they had premarital sex and were stupid enough to be unprotected!

I knew a pregnant girl in high school. I knew her since 1st grade. She ended up dropping out of high school in the 11th grade and the father never married her. I've known students of mine who got pregnant.  In most of the cases except in very financially capable parents, it meant the end of dreams to become a nurse, a teacher, an accountant, etc. and put the mother on a path of being in a lower-income life than overwise.

The girl in the article says she wouldn't changed things for the world! I bet she especially wouldn't change the financial burden her parents or grandparents took up!  She says that the father is hard-working, but conveniently leaves out what kind of job he has and when he began working - did he do so at age 16? Now, at 19, does he even have a high school diploma?  Does she?  Do they have health insurance? Is the kid on SCHIP (welfare) health insurance?  There's no mention of their financial situation except to say she's in school and the both work. You can bet that means limited income. And notice she doesn't even thank whoever's watching the baby while she's in school and working!  Another thing she wouldn't change for the world!

She compares herself to her grandparents who fell in love at ages 14 and 17. But they married at 19 and 22 and had their first kid at 20 and 23.  If she doesn't see the difference, then she doesn't have the understanding to be writing an article saying she's the same.

[Airehead]

I didn’t have anyone in my graduating class but as a 30 plus year educator, I have watched this play out. Typically not with great endings. 

[Naomi]

I have a cousin, my age and a former classmate, who had a child at 16 years of age.  They had their second at 18.  They were sponsored by their parents from then on, living in basement suites and eating with the family.  My cousin was given a job driving for a potato chip maker, and he still holds that position.  When grandparents passed away, they left money to these two that others in the family did not receive.  When they needed cars, the parents supplied them.   The young mother, left high school and remained an at home mom until she was in her 50's.  At that time, parents were passing and the couple inherited the home they lived in the basement of and moved upstairs.  His parents, my mom's relatives, will pass soon.  They are in ill health and advanced age.  The couple will receive the bulk of the inheritance when that happens and will retire on his parents funds at that time. 

I don't keep in touch with them.  They both stopped development as people in their teens and we have absolutely nothing in common.  Their love spawns have had children at similar ages and those now have kids.  So, at 60, my cousin has great grand children.  Aside from a few years where my cousins wife was banging the youth minister of their church, they have remained together and are said to be happy.  Not a life I would choose but, different strokes.. 

[shootingstar]

11 hours ago, MickinMD said:

I knew a pregnant girl in high school. I knew her since 1st grade. She ended up dropping out of high school in the 11th grade and the father never married her. I've known students of mine who got pregnant.  In most of the cases except in very financially capable parents, it meant the end of dreams to become a nurse, a teacher, an accountant, etc. and put the mother on a path of being in a lower-income life than overwise.

The girl in the article says she wouldn't changed things for the world! I bet she especially wouldn't change the financial burden her parents or grandparents took up!  She says that the father is hard-working, but conveniently leaves out what kind of job he has and when he began working - did he do so at age 16? Now, at 19, does he even have a high school diploma?  Does she?  Do they have health insurance? Is the kid on SCHIP (welfare) health insurance?  There's no mention of their financial situation except to say she's in school and the both work. You can bet that means limited income. And notice she doesn't even thank whoever's watching the baby while she's in school and working!  Another thing she wouldn't change for the world!

For sure the burden falls on grandparents..if they insist the child must be kept and the teenage parent must work/have job.

Dearie's son and a girlfriend became pregnant when they were 19 yrs. old.  They never lived together/married thereafter.  Dearie was very disappointed prior to all that, because at that time, his son didn't finish high school, when he was only within 6 months of finishing. So dearie and his ex-wife told son he had to live away from home and get a job.  He was now an adult.  That was the ultimanum. Son moved from Ontario to British Columbia where he got jobs working in restaurants. That's when the pregnancy occurred.   Anyway child was raised by primarily her Portuguese immigrant parents . Child visited dearie's ex on weekends, etc.  Dearie had long moved out to B.C.

dearie's son (who is now 40), is married to another woman who is career driven and they have 2 sons (5 & 7 yrs.).  He did finish high school and a college program in the hospitality and culinary world.  He has cooked and managed kitchens for some global hotel kitchens, managed a restaurant for hard-to-employ youth in Toronto.  He runs his butcher sandwich shop with 2 other guys who are steady and long time buds for 4 yrs.  Dearie is a real partner financially in the business and as noted before, he does all the online book-keeping. He is slowly teaching his son some of this stuff because 1 day he can no longer do it.  He loves doing this because he loves to grow small businesses and also non-profit organizations.  (He has a MBA on top his engineering degree.)  I do see abit of big gap just on numeracy skills where dearie's skills is far advanced ….so one day his son might have to  pay someone when dearie can no longer do this.

Meanwhile son of girlfriend, will graduate from high school next year. He may gun for  college program. He hasn't shown the inclination/marks for more academic route to university. He's a good kid and is naturally a patient person.  I find it amazing he has bounced amongst 4 households:  his birth father's place (where he is with 2 step-brothers), then his mother's ex-hubby (2nd guy) household where he has another set of 2 step-brothers, his Portuguese grandparents and finally, dearie's ex-wife's household in Toronto.  Dearie takes him out for football, meals whenever he visits Toronto (from B.C.) which is not often.    Honestly, as a kid I would feel disrupted and scattered.  the kid has learned how to navigate in this world of 4 households.

[Ralphie ★]

We had a token one. It was a good warning to the restofus. 

[shootingstar]

8 hours ago, Airehead said:

I didn’t have anyone in my graduating class but as a 30 plus year educator, I have watched this play out. Typically not with great endings. 

It really helps that the parents insist children complete high school.  My parents pushed  that we go further into university. It's never a guarantee but they didn't want our options limited to only low-paying, manual jobs. My mother didn't finish high school in China.  But those were different times.

[JerrySTL ★]

I went to Catholic schools in the '60 and '70s. We only had one girl who got pregnant and she was able to hide it until after graduation. I dare say that an obviously pregnant girl would not have been allowed to stay in school. 

[shootingstar]

8 hours ago, Wilbur said:

I have a cousin, my age and a former classmate, who had a child at 16 years of age.  They had their second at 18.  They were sponsored by their parents from then on, living in basement suites and eating with the family.  My cousin was given a job driving for a potato chip maker, and he still holds that position.  When grandparents passed away, they left money to these two that others in the family did not receive.  When they needed cars, the parents supplied them.   The young mother, left high school and remained an at home mom until she was in her 50's.  At that time, parents were passing and the couple inherited the home they lived in the basement of and moved upstairs.  His parents, my mom's relatives, will pass soon.  They are in ill health and advanced age.  The couple will receive the bulk of the inheritance when that happens and will retire on his parents funds at that time. 

I don't keep in touch with them.  They both stopped development as people in their teens and we have absolutely nothing in common.  Their love spawns have had children at similar ages and those now have kids.  So, at 60, my cousin has great grand children.  Aside from a few years where my cousins wife was banging the youth minister of their church, they have remained together and are said to be happy.  Not a life I would choose but, different strokes.. 

As a kid, I used to be embarrassed to tell my friends that my mother had me (as lst child out of 6) when she was 24 yr. and my father was 29 yrs.  All my friends at school, their mother  had their first child when mother was 17 yrs. old or so.

 

[groupw]

First exposure to a teen pregnancy was a girl a couple years older than me. She was 16. Father was 15. She reportedly went to a school for unwed mothers. She did return and graduate. She later married the owner of the local lumber yard. They met when she became his office manager. They stayed together until she died from cancer earlier this year. They were a great couple. I got to know them socially in my late 20s. 
My longest term friend got a girl pregnant when he was 16 and she was 14. Their parents took them to Kansas so they could marry. It had all the makings of a disaster. My friend had a bad spell when the baby was about 2. They separated for a few months but eventually worked it out.  He now owns his own contracting company and she is a receptionist at a doctors office. Their oldest daughter and her daughter both had children very young so they are great grandparents at 57 and 55. We see them a lot at the summer concerts downtown. We don’t have a ton in common but the love and hugs we share are real. They smile, live and dance with no reservations. I know they are exceptions, but sometimes things do end well 

[BuffJim]

My daughter had a friend who got pregnant at 13. She kept the guy - same age. 12 years later they’re still together. 
 

Im expecting to hear they are grandparents soon. 

[shootingstar]

12 minutes ago, BuffJim said:

My daughter had a friend who got pregnant at 13. She kept the guy - same age. 12 years later they’re still together. 
 

Im expecting to hear they are grandparents soon. 

  Wow.  Pregnant at 13 is hard to imagine. At her age, I was the primary babysitter for younger siblings at home, while mother went shopping with 1 other sibling to help her carry groceries. Father had car in a job in another city.

Nowadays some parents even hesitate to leave a 13 yr. child alone at home for a few hours. Or at 15 yrs. old when they just have flu.  So working parent stays at home the whole day. (This happens with some work colleagues where I work...which I find sorry..wierd.  Now with iphones to keep in constant contact. but what do I know....)   Minor....compared to getting pregnant so young.

[Rattlecan ★]

There was a girl in her senior year got pregnant with a teacher. They got married and fifty years later still together 

[Parsnip Totin Jack ★]

 

[ChrisL]

Sister #2 got pregnant at 16 back in the mid 60’s.  If course she had to marry the guy (huge mistake) and of course it didn’t work out so well.  She got her GED, not sure if she had to drop out or chose to. She struggled for a decade or so but married well and ended up living a very comfortable life.

I grew up with my nephew as we were only 10 months apart in age.  He had two sets of wonderful grandparents who took care of him while my sister worked.  

I probably could have been in the same boat with my HS girlfriend.  We weren’t smart at first and she didn’t want to discuss birth control with her mom.  

[Dottleshead ★]

As long as there is a penis and a vagina -- they're going to find a way to get together.

 

'Nuff said.

[The_Karen_Cooper_Incident]

11 hours ago, Wilbur said:

where my cousins wife was banging the youth minister

She sounds wonderful. 

Mudkipz 

[MickinMD ★]

16 hours ago, Airehead said:

I didn’t have anyone in my graduating class but as a 30 plus year educator, I have watched this play out. Typically not with great endings. 

My experiences as an educator are why the girl's article rubbed me the wrong way. Even at 18, she's saying everything is fine, she wouldn't have done anything different etc. while offering no examples of how they're as well off as they'd be if they waited. I've seen to many teens with similar attitudes put themselves way behind the 8 ball due to a mid-teen pregnancy.

[shootingstar]

41 minutes ago, MickinMD said:

My experiences as an educator are why the girl's article rubbed me the wrong way. Even at 18, she's saying everything is fine, she wouldn't have done anything different etc. while offering no examples of how they're as well off as they'd be if they waited. I've seen to many teens with similar attitudes put themselves way behind the 8 ball due to a mid-teen pregnancy.

As one of several educators in this forum, you probably  saw enough stories and you care for their intellectual development.

Oh, the mother of dearie's son's lst son  (got that straight?), did go back to college.  She remarried, got a job and had another additional 2 sons. Sure, grandparents are in the background looking after lst son at times. Married to another guy (who dearie met and thought he seemed like a dedicated, father) and then 10 years later, the woman is divorcing him..... but that's another off-track story.

I guess, Mick maybe the girl was trying to be a positive young mom ...but I agree, forgetting to credit her parents or his parents somewhere in her story.  Miracles of healthy, well-adjusted children,  just don't happen easily at all.