Dottleshead ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #1 Posted January 21, 2020 Have you done all you wanted to do in this world should you suddenly become terminally ill? Are you prepared for the end? Do you think you'll pass gracefully or will you go out fighting? Will you sit quietly and meditate as the plane crashes to earth or will you be hollering? Cussing? Is there enough time left or do you feel like you've been on the planet too long already? Are you fearful, indifferent, prefer to remain ignorant, or are you ready to go? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #2 Posted January 21, 2020 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyr Posted January 21, 2020 Share #3 Posted January 21, 2020 I will fight to my last dying breath...., there are still too many cool things I want to experience 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allen ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #4 Posted January 21, 2020 Death is the root of all fear. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JerrySTL ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #5 Posted January 21, 2020 I won't know until it happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sheep_herder ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #6 Posted January 21, 2020 No 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Razors Edge ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #7 Posted January 21, 2020 I will not not go gently into that good night, if that's your question. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Mr. Silly Posted January 21, 2020 Popular Post Share #8 Posted January 21, 2020 I don't fear death. I am more concerned about the process of dying. I don't want it to be painful, I don't want it to linger and I don't want to be a bother to others. As for how I go, I haven't a clue. I'll probably drown, drunk at the bottom of an outhouse. It won't be my proudest moment. 1 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddmaxx ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #9 Posted January 21, 2020 I fear the waste. I cannot fathom that all of my memories will simply cease to exist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
late Posted January 21, 2020 Share #10 Posted January 21, 2020 4 minutes ago, Razors Edge said: I will not not go gently into that good night, if that's your question. Do not go gentle into that good night,Old age should burn and rave at close of day;Rage, rage against the dying of the light.Though wise men at their end know dark is right,Because their words had forked no lightning theyDo not go gentle into that good night.Good men, the last wave by, crying how brightTheir frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,Rage, rage against the dying of the light.Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,Do not go gentle into that good night.Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sightBlind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,Rage, rage against the dying of the light.And you, my father, there on the sad height,Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.Do not go gentle into that good night.Rage, rage against the dying of the light. From The Poems of Dylan Thomas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Razors Edge ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #11 Posted January 21, 2020 1 minute ago, Mr. Silly said: I don't fear death. I am more concerned about the process of dying. I don't want it to be painful, I don't want it to linger and I don't want to be a bother to others. That's a pretty common feeling I think. The dying part is way tougher than the dead part. When you're dead, there is apparently a chance you become a superhero, When you're dying, it is pretty much the opposite. Dying with dignity is a real challenge :( and often a very emotionally traumatizing time for loved ones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Road Runner Posted January 21, 2020 Share #12 Posted January 21, 2020 18 minutes ago, sheep_herder said: No Me neither, although I do fear the possible pain that might be associated with it, such as from some terrible lingering form of cancer. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parsnip Totin Jack ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #13 Posted January 21, 2020 I’m ready except for making the mix-tape for my memorial service. I’ve got the songs picked out, working on the order right now. That and ordering the food and liquor. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottleshead ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Author Share #14 Posted January 21, 2020 24 minutes ago, Old#7 said: I’m ready except for making the mix-tape for my memorial service. I’ve got the songs picked out, working on the order right now. That and ordering the food and liquor. Party on Garth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reverend_Maynard Posted January 21, 2020 Share #15 Posted January 21, 2020 i'm ready to go 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilbur ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #16 Posted January 21, 2020 Not at all, for me. I fear the death of friends and family and even my dogs. That doesn't mean I am ready to go. It just means I have no fear of the inevitable. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
12string Posted January 21, 2020 Share #17 Posted January 21, 2020 I don't fear death, I'm ready. I'm more concerned that the people around me aren't ready for me to go, so I'll defer to them. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilbur ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #18 Posted January 21, 2020 4 minutes ago, 12string said: I don't fear death, I'm ready. I'm more concerned that the people around me aren't ready for me to go, so I'll defer to them. Are you talking to us?? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #19 Posted January 21, 2020 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottleshead ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Author Share #20 Posted January 21, 2020 42 minutes ago, Wilbur said: Not at all, for me. I fear the death of friends and family and even my dogs. That doesn't mean I am ready to go. It just means I have no fear of the inevitable. That's where I am at. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Zealot Posted January 21, 2020 Popular Post Share #21 Posted January 21, 2020 “So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide. Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and grovel to none. When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and no thing, for abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision.When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.” ~ Chief Tecumseh 3 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #22 Posted January 21, 2020 4 minutes ago, Dottles said: That's where I am at. All my friends are dead or they're dying And our laughter turns into crying It's death defying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottleshead ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Author Share #23 Posted January 21, 2020 2 minutes ago, jsharr said: All my friends are dead or they're dying And our laughter turns into crying It's death defying. So start tearing up? You're onto something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #24 Posted January 21, 2020 Hopefully stage 4 is a sudden transition from stage 3 with little to no pain. The first three stages have been painful Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Indy Posted January 21, 2020 Share #25 Posted January 21, 2020 Nope, I hear she's pretty cool Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottleshead ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Author Share #26 Posted January 21, 2020 You have strange states Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Longjohn ★ Posted January 21, 2020 Share #27 Posted January 21, 2020 Don't ever laugh as a Hearse goes byFor you may be the next to dieThey wrap you up in a big white sheetFrom your head down to your feet They put you in a big black boxAnd cover you up with dirt and rocksAnd all goes well for about a weekAnd then your coffin begins to leak And the worms crawl in, the worms crawl outThe worms play pinochle on your snoutThey eat your eyes, they eat your noesThey eat the jelly between your toes A big green worm with rolling eyesCrawls in your stomach and out your eyesYour stomach turns a slimy greenAnd puss comes out like whipping cream You spread it on a slice of breadAnd that's what you eat when your deadAnd the worms crawl out and the worms crawl inThe worms that crawl in are lean and thin The ones that crawl out are fat and stoutYour eyes fall in and your hair falls outYour brain comes tumbling down your snout And the worms crawl in, the worms crawl outThey crawl all over your dirty snoutYour chest caves in and your eyes pop outAnd your brain turns to sauerkraut They invite their friends, and their friends tooThey all come down to chew on youAnd this is what it is to dieI hope you had a nice goodbye Did you ever think as a Hearse goes byThat you may be the next to dieAnd your eyes fall out and your teeth decayAnd that is the end of a perfect... day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Airehead Posted January 22, 2020 Share #28 Posted January 22, 2020 Something I read from Bradford Smith and try to use it as a guide: This relatedness of life, as it binds us to all that has passed, surely binds us to the future as well. So the divine spark kindled in us can never really be extinguished for it is part of a universal flame. Once we have squarely faced the inescapable fact of our own death, we need never fear it but turn and live life to the hilt as we have seen that it should be lived. Then, whether that life be long or short, it will be a full one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Ralphie ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Popular Post Share #29 Posted January 22, 2020 All I ask of dying, is to go naturally. ie, peacefully in my sleep, not yelling and screaming like my passengers. 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Further Posted January 22, 2020 Share #30 Posted January 22, 2020 More than death I fear becoming disabled. I'm not ready to die yet, there are still people depending on me. It is irritating that I feel like I'm almost grown up, and the end is so close. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MickinMD ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Share #31 Posted January 22, 2020 I don't think I'll ever do everything I want to do, but I don't fear death - I just try to keep it from becoming a near probability. My biggest fear is living to the point where I'm in constant pain or my mind is gone or I'm too immobile and slow thinking to do anything. I've already told my younger siblings to pull the plug if I get to that point. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
groupw Posted January 22, 2020 Share #32 Posted January 22, 2020 I don’t want to die, yet. I have a lot I still want to do. However, if it were to happen, I know my family is taken care of and they will have good memories. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BR46 Posted January 22, 2020 Share #33 Posted January 22, 2020 7 hours ago, Zephyr said: there are still too many cool things I want to experience I have list of things that I want do before I go. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottleshead ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Author Share #34 Posted January 22, 2020 39 minutes ago, BR46 said: I have list of things that I want do before I go. Get busy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted January 22, 2020 Share #35 Posted January 22, 2020 8 hours ago, Old#7 said: I’m ready except for making the mix-tape for my memorial service. I’ve got the songs picked out, working on the order right now. That and ordering the food and liquor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Page Turner Posted January 22, 2020 Share #36 Posted January 22, 2020 ...everybody dies. You can't fear what appears to be a universal human experience. Unless maybe you believe in hell and eternal torment. In which case you ought to get your shit together while you still can. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bikeguy Posted January 22, 2020 Share #37 Posted January 22, 2020 I don’t fear death. I suppose I ignore death. Over the last few years I’ve become aware how fragile life is, which means we are much closer to death than we care to admit. I’ve learned to enjoy the day(s) I have with my wife, family and friends. Life is fragile... My best friend who I meet in high school who was a scuba diver, runner, cyclist, healthy, etc… and then for no reason anyone could find, he dies of esophagus cancer in 2018. Or even myself, back in 2016 my first day of vacation in mid August, I went for a 36 mile ride, then decided to stop at 25 miles, because I had to mow the grass with a push mower for 2 hours. (it was hot) That evening, OMG did I get stomach pain. Three weeks later, I returned to work after acute pancreatitis. No one could explain why I got this. Before that, I don’t think I missed more a total of 4 day of work for sickness since I started working in the mid 70s. When someone asks me, how are you? I usually tell them, “I’m on the green side of the grass, it’s a good day”. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Longjohn ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Share #38 Posted January 22, 2020 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prophet Zacharia Posted January 22, 2020 Share #39 Posted January 22, 2020 And I am not frightened of dying Any time will do, I don't mindWhy should I be frightened of dying?There's no reason for it, you've gotta go sometimeIf you can hear this whispering you are dying Short answer: no. I’m more concerned about mistiming my retirement, so that I work too long and have too little time to enjoy retirement before my time comes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottleshead ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Author Share #40 Posted January 22, 2020 4 minutes ago, Prophet Zacharia said: And I am not frightened of dying Any time will do, I don't mindWhy should I be frightened of dying?There's no reason for it, you've gotta go sometimeIf you can hear this whispering you are dying Short answer: no. I’m more concerned about mistiming my retirement, so that I work too long and have too little time to enjoy retirement before my time comes. 7 hours ago, BR46 said: I have list of things that I want do before I go. Get busy + Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottleshead ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Author Share #41 Posted January 22, 2020 5 minutes ago, Prophet Zacharia said: And I am not frightened of dying Any time will do, I don't mindWhy should I be frightened of dying?There's no reason for it, you've gotta go sometimeIf you can hear this whispering you are dying Short answer: no. I’m more concerned about mistiming my retirement, so that I work too long and have too little time to enjoy retirement before my time comes. Pinkus Floydus crankus upus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BR46 Posted January 22, 2020 Share #42 Posted January 22, 2020 20 minutes ago, Dottles said: Get busy + do you know something I don't? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottleshead ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Author Share #43 Posted January 22, 2020 3 minutes ago, BR46 said: do you know something I don't? I have these thoughts all the time: get in before it's too late. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BR46 Posted January 22, 2020 Share #44 Posted January 22, 2020 7 minutes ago, Dottles said: I have these thoughts all the time: get in before it's too late. That's the way I am too........ Do it now because you might not be here tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottleshead ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Author Share #45 Posted January 22, 2020 11 minutes ago, BR46 said: That's the way I am too........ Do it now because you might not be here tomorrow. No coincidence that I am in the ER as we speak. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BR46 Posted January 22, 2020 Share #46 Posted January 22, 2020 28 minutes ago, Dottles said: No coincidence that I am in the ER as we speak. Were the words hold my beer involved with this trip to the ER? 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tizeye Posted January 22, 2020 Share #47 Posted January 22, 2020 The whole issue of mortality is front and center right now with my mother, her husband, and my SIL and in probably each case it would be a blessing. In each case, I think they are ready but at least one of the kids hasn't granted permission so they hang on. My 90y/o mother's husband of 10 yrs, diagnosed with COPD last year and declined rapidly which surprised us as expected him to outlive her. Died Jan 2 and funeral Monday a week ago and was weird to be me described in the obit as the surviving son in law as never really thought of that as getting married at 80 when he was 78, just her late in life husband. She was able to avoid a difficult decision removing from vent or transition with trach (she felt obligated and children's pressure to try everything) as his organs began shutting down. As they were getting in the car for the hour drive to the hospital to initiate and be present as removed from the vent, got a call from the hospital that he died during the night. While I have to respect it, the weirdest part is that they obtained burial plots next to each other, rather him not next to his wife of 51 years, nor her not in a family plot with 3 generations of her family including her first husband, my father, and her3 children who died in their first months. Perhaps it is me, but when kids visit grave sites, seems like would expect both parents they knew to be side by side. My mother, would not be surprised if sometime this year...just hope it is her heart which would be quick. Currently in hospital, extreme pain (and disoriented on pain medication) following surgery yesterday for skin grafting of third degree burns on hand and lesser burns to the face clearing away dead skin only during the surgery, plus the surgery will need to be repeated in 3 days or so as used cadaver skin to allow further healing, then repeat with skin from her thighs which they were afraid would be rejected (wasted resource) in her current condition. My mother has limited mobility using a walker, and the burns occurred when she was scrambling some eggs, not for her but for her dog who of course became excited under foot tripping her up and apparently reached out placing her hand(s) on the burner trying to break her fall while carrying the frying pan. Today or tomorrow should have the results of the long delayed biopsy eventually obtained last week and fully expect it to be colo-rectal cancer that imaging and other tests suggested but my sister held on to "surgical sponge left behind in hemorrhoidal surgery" in July which was probably a misdiagnosis and potentially punctured the tumor, spreading it. Will be interesting hearing the staging, lymph node involvement and proposed treatment if an for a 90 y/o, plus probably couldn't begin chemo for anyone reducing their immune system in the middle of burn recovery. The sunrise picture I posted last week was my spending the night at mom's two days after the funeral as I took her to the hospital in Tampa (and hour away) that AM for the colonoscopy at the cancer center - and I will spare you the pictures from the colonoscopy as they don't look good. This colonoscopy was a reschedule as she was admitted to hospital with dx of congestive heart failure when originally scheduled and the anesthesiologist almost didn't do the colonoscopy until received records that heart function, while low, was high enough. My SIL, while a medical mess through out her life and always having to one-up other's medical issues, like my wife's concussion or various surgeries, shifting discussion back to her. She is probably in later stages of COPD and absolutely refusing assisted living or moving in with her son. She had a grapefruit size non-malignant brain tumor removed 15 yrs ago in a surgery that stretched over 7 hours. Couldn't get all of it so suspect has grown back. It is the side of the brain that affects decision making, impulsivity and speech which drives us crazy as any plans (assisted living, moving in with son's family, etc) she cancels at the 11th hour. Currently in the hospital/nursing home cycle (result of a fall), readmitted two days after that discharge (confusion, disorientation, infection) from nursing home with about a week left of Medicare authorized days. Given her history, don't know if she will make it the required 60 days outside a hospital to begin a new 30 day Medicare nursing home eligibility. Private pay would totally devastate her finances. We will probably drive the two hours to visit her on Friday. All of these stacked together in a narrow timeframe really bring out the issue of ones own mortality. With me, it's simple. Burial in a national cemetery as a military benefit and spouse is also eligible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tizeye Posted January 22, 2020 Share #48 Posted January 22, 2020 14 hours ago, jsharr said: Hopefully stage 4 is a sudden transition from stage 3 with little to no pain. The first three stages have been painful Wouldn't count on it, but hospice palliative care helps. When my step-father (mother's second husband - not the third discussed above) in the final days of pancreatic cancer there is pain as bodily organs shut down and blood chemistry becomes all out of whack. Of course he became disoriented seeing lions in the back yard, etc,he was on heavy doses of morphine. Mom felt the urge to overdose him, but couldn't with her religious beliefs - plus it is good as she would be blaming herself forever. A very difficult decision. With cancer and other prolonged death process, for the survivors it is not a grieving process but a relief that finally at rest with no pain and suffering. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Share #49 Posted January 22, 2020 27 minutes ago, Tizeye said: Wouldn't count on it, but hospice palliative care helps. When my step-father (mother's second husband - not the third discussed above) in the final days of pancreatic cancer there is pain as bodily organs shut down and blood chemistry becomes all out of whack. Of course he became disoriented seeing lions in the back yard, etc,he was on heavy doses of morphine. Mom felt the urge to overdose him, but couldn't with her religious beliefs - plus it is good as she would be blaming herself forever. A very difficult decision. With cancer and other prolonged death process, for the survivors it is not a grieving process but a relief that finally at rest with no pain and suffering. I rode the cancer hospice care palliative care roller coaster with my father in law. I would rather have the massive coronary and be gone than linger with cancer. Few of are as lucky as David Olney, who passed this week during a singing performance. He said "I am sorry" put his head on his chest and passed away on the stool he was sitting on. Did not fall off, did not drop his guitar. Sad and tragic yes, but he died doing what he loved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MickinMD ★ Posted January 22, 2020 Share #50 Posted January 22, 2020 11 hours ago, Page Turner said: ...everybody dies. You can't fear what appears to be a universal human experience. Unless maybe you believe in hell and eternal torment. In which case you ought to get your shit together while you still can. I swear there ain't no heaven but I pray there ain't no hell! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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