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I had a dream last night, that I moved into my old house in Cleveland.


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I always feel a sense of dread when I visit my friends in Cleveland, and drive past Lakewood Ohio on I-90.  This route, which I purposely avoid now, goes right past my old house in Lakewood Ohio.

I have alot of really bad memories from there.  I have memories of futile attempts to control my drinking.  I lived in this house for only two years, from 2005 to 2007.  It's when the physical addiction began for both Vodka and Opiates.  However, it was my introduction to AA but the 'God' thing really freaked me out at the time.  Anyway, just driving past Lakewood immediately sends me into a panic and I have to control my breathing.  It's pretty fucked up.

I wish I would have had a dream of being back in Pittsburgh.  Even though my addiction soared to new levels in Pittsburgh, I don't seem to have those really bad feelings.  I love Pittsburgh, it's just a better city minus the NFL football team.  Their hockey team is the best though.

I have no idea why I'm telling you all this.  I just woke up and I haven't had my Portland coffee yet.  

Shu Fang

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6 hours ago, Shu Fang said:

I always feel a sense of dread when I visit my friends in Cleveland, and drive past Lakewood Ohio on I-90.  This route, which I purposely avoid now, goes right past my old house in Lakewood Ohio.

I have alot of really bad memories from there.  I have memories of futile attempts to control my drinking.  I lived in this house for only two years, from 2005 to 2007.  It's when the physical addiction began for both Vodka and Opiates.  However, it was my introduction to AA but the 'God' thing really freaked me out at the time.  Anyway, just driving past Lakewood immediately sends me into a panic and I have to control my breathing.  It's pretty fucked up.

I wish I would have had a dream of being back in Pittsburgh.  Even though my addiction soared to new levels in Pittsburgh, I don't seem to have those really bad feelings.  I love Pittsburgh, it's just a better city minus the NFL football team.  Their hockey team is the best though.

I have no idea why I'm telling you all this.  I just woke up and I haven't had my Portland coffee yet.  

Shu Fang

I hope you and Tude make plenty of very happy memories for the future.  

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