Square Wheels Posted October 22, 2013 Share #1 Posted October 22, 2013 Man Calls Cops for Theft From Pa. Workers' Fridge BREINIGSVILLE, Pa. October 21, 2013 (AP) If you ever had your lunch disappear from the office refrigerator, consider what one southeastern Pennsylvania man did: He called the cops. KYW-TV in Philadelphia ( http://cbsloc.al/1814Yx0 ) reports that Upper Macungie Township police were called Oct. 10. That's when, according to a police news release, an employee at Wakefern Food Corp. reported "that an unknown person stole his Jell-O brand strawberry Jell-O snack from the break room refrigerator." Police say the 39-year-old victim was angry because this wasn't the first time someone had stolen his food. So far, police say the thief hasn't been caught. Police say in a news release that the case remains under investigation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #2 Posted October 22, 2013 you don't fuck around with a man's Jell-O 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted October 22, 2013 Share #3 Posted October 22, 2013 I think this is reasonable. Cameras should be set up to catch the perp, and then slam his ass in jail after you fire him. Seriously, if nobody in your company gives a sh it that your lunch is repeatedly stolen, you can safely assume you have no real future there, or you at least don't want there to be one. You might as well publicly embarrass them and have some fun with this. Personally, I would probably spike my jello with exlax or pcp or something, then call out the druggie after his or her bizarre behavior is witnessed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #4 Posted October 22, 2013 I had this happen one time I put dog jerky treats in a plastic baggie and put them in the fridge. When they were gone, I went in the break room and said "hey, just so you know, whichever of you fuckers that ate that jerky, that was dog jerky treats that I put in there. You just ate dog food" 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Square Wheels Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share #5 Posted October 22, 2013 We've had repeat offenders here where a couple of people, and they are very nice people, have had their Chobani yogurts swiped. In high school we were building a solar house. Each morning we would stop at a convenience store to get snacks / drinks. I would get a 2 liter bottle of Pepsi only to find it 1/2 gone at lunch time. One day I poured some out and added cement to it. A few people had stomach aches that day. Don't ef with my Pepsi (I no longer drink any soda ). 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted October 22, 2013 Share #6 Posted October 22, 2013 We've had repeat offenders here where a couple of people, and they are very nice people, have had their Chobani yogurts swiped. In high school we were building a solar house. Each morning we would stop at a convenience store to get snacks / drinks. I would get a 2 liter bottle of Pepsi only to find it 1/2 gone at lunch time. One day I poured some out and added cement to it. A few people had stomach aches that day. Don't ef with my Pepsi (I no longer drink any soda ). In college, one of my buddies lived in a suite with 16 people, 4 rooms with 4 to a room. Beer was often swiped from the fridges, and we figured out out which of the guys it was. We then got 7 quarts of some nasty beer and some ex-laxy type pills that we crushed to a powder. We each drank 3 of the beers and spiked the last with the powder (a lot of it) and swirled it around pretty well and waited for the cheap bastard roommate to arrive. He showed up and we claimed to have drank at a bar before getting more and having more at the room, did he want the last quart? Of course he did. Anyway, he woke up with the runs at about 4 in the morning, and we had a great laugh at his expense. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtyhip Posted October 22, 2013 Share #7 Posted October 22, 2013 We don't have much theft at my work. My lunch has never been touched. People have asked to taste my things and have asked about how I make my food. Never has someone had the nerve to take anything without permission. Sometimes, I forget to lock my bike too. It is nice to live in a small town Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Square Wheels Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share #8 Posted October 22, 2013 I lost a jacket at work once, I think I know which of the stupid bitches here took it though - claims I let her "borrow" it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #9 Posted October 22, 2013 My lunch has never been touched all that kale and quinoa, no ****ing wonder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtyhip Posted October 22, 2013 Share #10 Posted October 22, 2013 It's not all healthy lunches, Nate. Sometimes, I bring an egg salad sammie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #11 Posted October 22, 2013 nobody steals the egg salad? shocker Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted October 22, 2013 Share #12 Posted October 22, 2013 I like egg salad, I bet DH makes it nicely! I still want to make ham salad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtyhip Posted October 22, 2013 Share #13 Posted October 22, 2013 Thank you, RG. Nate underestimates my cooking abilities. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted October 22, 2013 Share #14 Posted October 22, 2013 Thank you, RG. Nate underestimates my cooking abilities. He doesn't know the goodness that you conjure regularly. I would love to be in on a Nate and DH battle in kitchen stadium, I bet it would be an amazing feast! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #15 Posted October 22, 2013 I could out cook you on your cookingest day even if you were using an electrified cooking machine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Square Wheels Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share #16 Posted October 22, 2013 I could out cook you on your cookingest day even if you were using an electrified cooking machine Fried squirrel ain't cookin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #17 Posted October 22, 2013 Fried squirrel ain't cookin. not the way you make it, but I take the fur off of them before I throw them in the flour Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtyhip Posted October 22, 2013 Share #18 Posted October 22, 2013 I could out cook you on your cookingest day even if you were using an electrified cooking machine People that brag are usually the ones with the least skills. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #19 Posted October 22, 2013 People that brag are usually the ones with the least skills. that sounds like you're scared to take up the challenge Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted October 22, 2013 Share #20 Posted October 22, 2013 I like the direction that this is going. I feel we should descend on PA and have some sort of cooking/eating event. The best spread I have seen has been the event FSOG put on a few years ago. Man, those people can cook! Homebrew was excellent, too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtyhip Posted October 22, 2013 Share #21 Posted October 22, 2013 that sounds like you're scared to take up the challenge I am not scared of a cooking contest. Got an extra bedroom for us? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtyhip Posted October 22, 2013 Share #22 Posted October 22, 2013 Oh, and I would like to have a little MTBing race with you, while we're out there. I bet I could beat you on the climbs and the flats. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #23 Posted October 22, 2013 you could kill me on a MTB. I haven't ridden trail since I was 37 and sure...I have an extra room...yea, that's what it is. its sort of extra.Well, more like its sort of a room. But I got a tent if you don't like it I was so sure you'd chicken out that I went and searched up a whole bunch of chicken images to taunt you with now I guess I'll just wait for JSharr to post something poultry related Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted October 22, 2013 Share #24 Posted October 22, 2013 I haven't ridden tail since I was 37 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #25 Posted October 22, 2013 "Trail" t-r-a-i-l as in MTB TRAIL I swear, boy, you got a one track mind with an 8 track tape playing on it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtyhip Posted October 22, 2013 Share #26 Posted October 22, 2013 you could kill me on a MTB. I haven't ridden trail since I was 37 Why not? I thought you were a mountain biker. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #27 Posted October 22, 2013 Why not? I thought you were a mountain biker. no, road bike all the way I always crash riding trails. I have a good time, but I always crash and I just don't heal fast like I used to. So I had to give it up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtyhip Posted October 22, 2013 Share #28 Posted October 22, 2013 no, road bike all the way I always crash riding trails. I have a good time, but I always crash and I just don't heal fast like I used to. So I had to give it up But, you're younger than I am. I sometimes crash too. I have some scratches from this weekend to prove that fact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nate Posted October 22, 2013 Share #29 Posted October 22, 2013 I didn't realize you were 50 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtyhip Posted October 22, 2013 Share #30 Posted October 22, 2013 You're 50? I am 45, and I am not hanging up my MTB gear anytime soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randomguy Posted October 22, 2013 Share #31 Posted October 22, 2013 I am not scared of a cooking contest. Got an extra bedroom for us? I commit to being at this contest, I will bring some beer. Who else is coming? Is there land to put a tent? When would this best take place? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralphie ★ Posted June 5, 2014 Share #32 Posted June 5, 2014 I commit to being at this contest, I will bring some beer. Who else is coming? Is there land to put a tent? When would this best take place? So has this gone cold? I say you shoudl do it either at Nateland or SuziQs Bohemian Paradice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pokey Posted June 6, 2014 Share #33 Posted June 6, 2014 Aw hell...I'd love to see this cook off. I volunteer to be the tasty judge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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