Well, I think I found my dad a new home

[Dottleshead ★]

Just got back from visiting an Adult Family Home in his home town and I felt really good about it.  It's quiet and peaceful.  I told the folks running the place that I needed to give full diligence and visit two other places on Saturday but in the back of my mind I felt really good about this home.  It's theirs to lose.  It's in a beautiful setting and the home itself is very comfortable and relaxing.  The owners are of Romanian descent and lovely people.  He'd have his own room and there'd be someone there around the clock.  The place has all the equipment and I was impressed with the caregivers.  I just really feel like he can thrive there.  It's like 10-15 from his house and his family could see him daily and I can come down and visit him during the weekdays. Most importantly, I think it could be his final stop and I would not feel like I've dumped him. 

I don't want to celebrate too early and we need to settle the financial end but I feel very, very relieved I have found something I can live with.  It's my sincere hope he can too.  I mean knowing where he is going to land and getting other members of the family to agree with it is a tall order -- particularly when those other family members are still believing he is fit to go home (he's not).   It may not be perfect but frankly it's as good as anything I'm going to find him.

Again, it's a giant relief.

[Prophet Zacharia]

Is this personal care, or a nursing facility?

[Dottleshead ★]

Personal care.  Washington state promotes the Adult Family Home model... which essentially is a third party home which allows certified homes to provide personal care for their individuals.  

[Razors Edge ★]

1 minute ago, Dottie said:

Personal care.  Washington state promotes the Adult Family Home model... which essentially is a third party home which allows certified homes to provide personal care for their individuals.  

Seems some states will not have that "luxury" in the near future   Likely some degree of hyperbole, but when your younger folks don't stick around in your state, things get tough for the older generations.

‘This will be catastrophic’: Maine families face elder boom, worker shortage in preview of nation’s future

Janet Flaherty got an alarming call last October from the agency tasked with coordinating in-home care for her 82-year-old mother. It could no longer send her mom’s home caretaker. It knew of no other aides who could care for her mother, either.

Flaherty’s mother, Caroline, has for two years qualified for in-home care paid for by the state’s Medicaid program. But the agency could not find someone to hire amid a severe shortage of workers that has crippled facilities for seniors across the state.

With private help now bid up to $50 an hour, Janet and her two sisters have been forced to do what millions of families in a rapidly aging America have done: take up second, unpaid jobs caring full time for their mother.

“We do not know what to do. We do not know where to go. We are in such dire need of help,” said Flaherty, an insurance saleswoman.

Across Maine, families like the Flahertys are being hammered by two slow-moving demographic forces — the growth of the retirement population and a simultaneous decline in young workers — that have been exacerbated by a national worker shortage pushing up the cost of labor. The unemployment rate in Maine is 3.2 percent, below the national average of 3.7 percent.

The disconnect between Maine’s aging population and its need for young workers to care for that population is expected to be mirrored in states throughout the country over the coming decade, demographic experts say. And that’s especially true in states with populations with fewer immigrants, who are disproportionately represented in many occupations serving the elderly, statistics show.

[Kirby]

Any change can be hard, and especially when that change signals a big change in the life of an older person. But it sounds like you are being very responsible making sure he gets the care he needs in the best possible setting.  I hope you find something that makes you happy and be assured you are doing what you think is best for your Dad.

[petitepedal ★]

I hope it works out Dottie

[Parsnip Totin Jack ★]

3 hours ago, Dottie said:

Personal care.  Washington state promotes the Adult Family Home model... which essentially is a third party home which allows certified homes to provide personal care for their individuals.  

That is what my MIL moved into in OH. Four residents, round the clock care, in a nice house in the burbs. Towards the end she spent 22 hours in bed, but she died cared for and peacefully.