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From a woman's perspective


Square Wheels

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I read this article in Runner's World that was really eye opening.  I'm not the type to comment on a woman as she's walking by or even to turn my head to watch her walk away.  It was kinda scary to hear how this makes this one woman feel.

 RW.pdf

​Do you have a link to the online version?  A PDF is like paper only different.

 

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About 27 years ago...I was in a study group on the U of MN campus...mostly female and we were talking about similar situations..one of the group members (a phd student...who also had a black belt) told us about an incident where she was walking home at night and keeping her self alert and watching..and she heard these footsteps... just as the footsteps caught up to her she turned...about ready to smack this person....and it was a male student/friend ...He couldn't believe she was so ready to go into attack mode...even though they had discussed this same topic in one of their classes...I just remember her sharing that with our group...because we all had our own plans and rituals for being alone on the streets....especially if it was night. 

Women don't just have to worry about possible violence...we have that whole sexual thing pointed at us all the time...sometimes it wears on a person.

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Women don't just have to worry about possible violence...we have that whole sexual thing pointed at us all the time...sometimes it wears on a person.

Which is all the more reason you have an avatar of your boobs, right?  I'm so confused.

Edited by dotman17
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Which is all the more reason you have an avatar of your boobs, right?  I'm so confused.

​If you think you're getting mixed signals, you should have seen my face when she asked me to take the picture! :o

 

(True story)

 

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Standing in the men's locker room this morning shaving.  Two guys to my right talking about admiring the girl doing jumping jacks.  I was tempted to say my sister would appreciate the comments, I'll tell her of your admiration.

When I was a young lad I did construction.  I guess I felt that required me to act like a neanderthal.  While driving in my company truck, emblazoned with the company name, I would hoot and holler at the pretty girls.  Then one day I saw a vanload of guys drive by and do the same thing I did.  I was embarrassed to call myself a male and never did it again.

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To be fair, I've seen discussions by strippers and when the guys and girls compared notes women customers were far worse in their behavior.

​I once had the displeasure of attending a womens stag that involved male strippers.  Yes, women are far worse with their comments.  The few times I have been to one, most men would glance or watch for a bit but never go stupid.

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​I once had the displeasure of attending a womens stag that involved male strippers.  Yes, women are far worse with their comments.  The few times I have been to one, most men would glance or watch for a bit but never go stupid.

According to the guys it wasn't just comments. It was far worse. 

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To be fair, I've seen discussions by strippers and when the guys and girls compared notes women customers were far worse in their behavior.

​I once had the displeasure of attending a womens stag that involved male strippers.  Yes, women are far worse with their comments.  The few times I have been to one, most men would glance or watch for a bit but never go stupid.

​I think these are different analogies to real life.  If a man or a woman takes their clothes off for a living, I presume they are hoping for comments.  A man or a woman walking down the street should not be subjected to the same rules.

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​I think these are different analogies to real life.  If a man or a woman takes their clothes off for a living, I presume they are hoping for comments.  A man or a woman walking down the street should not be subjected to the same rules.

​I agree SW but all humans are afflicted by visual appeal.  How we act on that though, is an indication of our level of civility and respect for others.

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​I think these are different analogies to real life.  If a man or a woman takes their clothes off for a living, I presume they are hoping for comments.  A man or a woman walking down the street should not be subjected to the same rules.

Agreed.

And I've performed.

I have to admit though, I think I'd personally find it complimentary if women cat called at me as I walked down the street. :D

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I have to admit though, I think I'd personally find it complimentary if women cat called at me as I walked down the street.

​I suspect I'd agree, but what if it were a dark street, maybe one you're not familiar with, and it wasn't one woman, but 5, and they were drunk and significantly larger and stronger than you...

I've only looked at this through my own selfish eyes.  At times it must be terrifying to be a woman.

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I have to admit though, I think I'd personally find it complimentary if women cat called at me as I walked down the street. :D

​I would too - but then again there's little risk of that being followed up with me being taken against my will.

unless Big Bertha's outta the joint.  She's not, is she? :o

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​I suspect I'd agree, but what if it were a dark street, maybe one you're not familiar with, and it wasn't one woman, but 5, and they were drunk and significantly larger and stronger than you...

I've only looked at this through my own selfish eyes.  At times it must be terrifying to be a woman.

Understood. And I agree with your thought process. When I was a small child I was often bullied by guys. I was also abused by a woman.  I knew then (with a child's simplicity) what the fear you are speaking of was like. Always having to be aware of your surroundings, always fearing the intent of strangers.

I vowed as I grew that I would not be that way again. And that was a lifetime ago.

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​I think these are different analogies to real life.  If a man or a woman takes their clothes off for a living, I presume they are hoping for comments.  A man or a woman walking down the street should not be subjected to the same rules.

It's not two different things, it's degrees of the same thing: "What is appropriate behavior?" Obviously that definition changes with circumstances. What is acceptable at a bachelor party would probably be frowned on if you did it in church.

(Just guessing through. I haven't been to either one in 30 years or so. Maybe things have changed).

 

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 What is acceptable at a bachelor party would probably be frowned on if you did it in church.

(Just guessing through. I haven't been to either one in 30 years or so. Maybe things have changed).

 

For some reason, that really made me laugh!!

:D

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