Kzoo Posted December 5, 2018 Share #1 Posted December 5, 2018 @Square Wheels is funny @parodybot is a respected member of our forum @Randomguy is an asset to society What great opening lies have stuck with you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Ralphie ★ Posted December 5, 2018 Popular Post Share #2 Posted December 5, 2018 Quote "Kzoo has excellent taste in most areas of his life. I appreciate his participation and look forward to his contributions." Cheese 9/21/17 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted December 5, 2018 Share #3 Posted December 5, 2018 Hey Kzoo, you are my favorite forum member. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralphie ★ Posted December 5, 2018 Share #4 Posted December 5, 2018 Quote I have been offended since Feb. 26th - @Kzoo 05/14/2018 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrentonMakes Posted December 5, 2018 Share #5 Posted December 5, 2018 The first one I thought of, I can't post, because it would get this kicked to P&R faster than you could swing a dead cat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Road Runner Posted December 5, 2018 Share #6 Posted December 5, 2018 Every lawyer ad on TV. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyr Posted December 5, 2018 Share #7 Posted December 5, 2018 I am interested in your mind. (my opening lie from back in my single days) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MickinMD ★ Posted December 6, 2018 Share #8 Posted December 6, 2018 The opening lie: "This is the Sicilian Dragon [Chess Opening]. Need I say more? So forget the likes of Star Wars, Terminator, Silence of the Lambs, etc. as Winning with the Sicilian Dragon 2 is the sequel you've really been waiting for!" - International Grandmaster Chris Ward, Preface, c.2001 My results playing it two matches it show he should have said more - like you've got to memorize reams of possible moves to keep up with your opponent! Hopefully the following is the opening truth and I'm now studying and planning to play it as Black the next time my opponent opens with the King's Pawn (1 e4): "This book is a study of the Sicilian Kan (1 e4 c5 2 Nf3 e6 3 d4 cxd4 4 Nxd4), an ideal opening for those playing Black who wish to learn the intricacies of the ever popular Sicilian Defence...A major selling point...is that...the onus is not on the player with the Black Pieces to memorize reams of opening theory simply to stay on the board." - International Grandmaster John Emms, Sicilian Kan (c.2002). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kzoo Posted December 6, 2018 Author Share #9 Posted December 6, 2018 2 hours ago, MickinMD said: The opening lie: "This is the Sicilian Dragon [Chess Opening]. Need I say more? So forget the likes of Star Wars, Terminator, Silence of the Lambs, etc. as Winning with the Sicilian Dragon 2 is the sequel you've really been waiting for!" - International Grandmaster Chris Ward, Preface, c.2001 My results playing it two matches it show he should have said more - like you've got to memorize reams of possible moves to keep up with your opponent! Hopefully the following is the opening truth and I'm now studying and planning to play it as Black the next time my opponent opens with the King's Pawn (1 e4): "This book is a study of the Sicilian Kan (1 e4 c5 2 Nf3 e6 3 d4 cxd4 4 Nxd4), an ideal opening for those playing Black who wish to learn the intricacies of the ever popular Sicilian Defence...A major selling point...is that...the onus is not on the player with the Black Pieces to memorize reams of opening theory simply to stay on the board." - International Grandmaster John Emms, Sicilian Kan (c.2002). Mick... Mick... Mick. You missed the heart of this parody. Please try again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddmaxx ★ Posted December 6, 2018 Share #10 Posted December 6, 2018 Did you know that guy you came in with is in the sex offender registry? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted December 6, 2018 Share #11 Posted December 6, 2018 That was funny @Square Wheels, can you tell us another one? We would love to hear it. Welcome back @AirwickWithCheese! Boy, I sure missed @Road Runner and @Wilbur! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jsharr ★ Posted December 6, 2018 Share #12 Posted December 6, 2018 Hey, Maxx, I would like you to meet my new friend Randomguy. He was hanging out at the park when the boys and I were at the playground. 48 minutes ago, maddmaxx said: Did you know that guy you came in with is in the sex offender registry? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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